The Johnsons

Starring:EsmÃ©e de la BretoniÃ¨re, Kenneth Herdigein, Monique van de Ven, Gerda Havertong, Elise Hoomans, Johan Leysen, Otto Sterman, Carol van Herwijnen, Rik van Uffelen, Olga Zuiderhoek, Kees Hulst, Miguel Stigter, Diederik van Nederveen, Erik van Wilsum, Marcel Colin, Nathan Moll, Jan-Mark Wams, Michel Bonset, Ewoud Poerink, Peter van der Linden
Director: Rudolf van den Berg
Studio: Anchor Bay
Product Type: DVD

Average customer rating:

"De Johnsons" isn't that bad, it just isn't that good
Let's go Dutch....on 2nd thought let's not
Would have been funny had it not been so serious.
A Classic!
A Wild Ride of a Horror Film--Silly, but Occasionally Scary

The Johnsons
Starring: Esmée de la Bretonière , Kenneth Herdigein , Monique van de Ven , Gerda Havertong , and Elise Hoomans
Director: Rudolf van den Berg
Manufacturer: Anchor Bay
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Horror | Genres | DVD | Video

DVDs Under $7.49 | Today's Deals in DVD | Special Features | DVD | Video

( J ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
Similar Items:

Slime City
Day of the Dead (Divimax Special Edition)
Baby Blood
The Cheerleaders Collection (The Cheerleaders/Revenge of the Cheerleaders/The Swinging Cheerleaders)
The Woods (Widescreen Edition)

ASIN: 6305388857
Release Date: 1999-05-04

Customer Reviews:

"De Johnsons" isn't that bad, it just isn't that good.......2006-07-10

Being Dutch myself, I am very curious how a horror movie from the motherland is "seen" in America. Not that Holland produces much horror flicks, but hey, we Dutch people are too sober for that, most of the time.

"The Johnsons" is directed by Rudolf van den Berg who has made some wel-crafted drama's like "De Avonden" and "Zoeken naar Eileen". Have these two been released in The States? I really don't know.
I know that "The Johnsons" is and I have a feeling that it won't please too much people, because in America, it has been done all before, and much better.

"The Johnsons" is about a murdering embryo who will bring darkness over the world, through the hands of seven psychopatic brothers. Only a university teacher and a teenage girl seem to know more and as the movie progresses, their paths intertwine.
The ending is as proposterous as bombastic, but because it is pulp, it's in its essence all about that specific law of "suspension of disbelieve".

That "The Johnsons" asks a lot of this suspension shows that it is a whole lotta pulp and crap. But there is something appealing about pulp-movies and their accumulation of disbelieves. The wacko-wacky plottwists, the far fetched stories about dark entities and omnipresent evil lurking in the dark, always some outcast people who know more than the ignorant mass, the final obligatory battle against good and evil.. if it is taken not all that seriously, it might actually be fun.

And hey, even if the movie makers took themselves and the movie very seriously, even then it can be fun - even more so sometimes, as in this case, I might say, in the case of "The Johnsons".
Loose all perseptive on reallity, loose all sense of logic, loose all longing for reason and punctuallity.

Just put in the dvd and loose it all good...

Let's go Dutch....on 2nd thought let's not.......2002-04-10

The only good thing about this Dutch [movie] is the cover.
Well Mommy and daughter are cute. That is the only thing this movie has going for it. I was so dissapointed with this film, I'll conclude quickly. There's no creatures (except a brief glimpse at the end). Big deal..the acting is ok, The Dutch location takes the cake though.. During a GARBAGE STRIKE! ... cares?? a dirty looking alley or something would have sufficed.They should have tossed this flick right in with it. Don't waste your money unless you like ... flix like this one that fell short of the trash can!
...

Would have been funny had it not been so serious........2002-02-15

The Johnsons (Rudolf van den Berg, 1992)

Rudolf van den Berg has won the Golden Calf, which is basically the Oscar, twice in his career, both times before this: in 1982 for San Senten Rebel (Best Long-form Documentary), and in 1984 for Bastille (Best director). I don't know whether that says worse things about the state of film in the Netherlands or their Academy. Probably neither, if America's own Academy is anything to go by (I'll omit yet another rant on the 2002 nominees). But if this guy is one of the cream of the crop over there, there is great pity to be had for the country.

The Johnsons isn't necessarily a bad film so much as it is a film that hovers on the verge of unintentional greatness. This had the potential to be horror comedy on the same plane as Return of the Living Dead or Dark Star. It missed the mark by such a small margin that it's painful to watch, but like a particularly gruesome car accident, the hapless viewer keeps watching, hoping and praying that somewhere within the mess a spark of life will be found.

The story begins with Dr. Johnson (Johan Leysen, presently onscreen in Brotherhood of the Wolf) delivering a set of septuplets, then going out into the woods and enacting, sloppily, some sort of odd ritual that ends with what looks like a squat stone idol encased in crystal rising out of a ring of fire in the middle of a lake. We then skip to twenty-one years later (present-day) and two intercut stories: one of a single mother, Victoria Lucas (Monique van de Ven, presently on the TV series Spangen, probably best known to American audiences for the not-too-bad action flick Amsterdamned) and her daughter Emily (the jaw-droppingly gorgeous Esmee de la Bretoniere, for whom this is the only film credit anyone in America has a chance at seeing without importing movies). Victoria, a photographer, takes a job tracking down some rare birds in a secluded swamp. Emily's been having recurring nightmares about seven crazy-looking kids painting a room with blood, and is in general disrepair emotionally, so Victoria takes her along, hoping that some time in the country will help her state of mind. The other story deals with Winston (Kenneth Herdegein, who's also frequently seen on TV these days over in Europe), an anthropology professor who's approached by police inspector de Graaf (veteran TV actor Rik van Uffelen-are you seeing a pattern here?) about seven psychopaths the police have been holding without public knowledge in an out-of-the-way abandoned prison in a secluded swamp. Winston's father (Otto Sterman), a voodoo priest, warns Winston and de Graaf to get their noses out of it while they can, but the two keep digging for info on the odd symbol said seven psychos keep drawing on the wall, usually in blood.

That's a brief synopsis of the film's first ten minutes; I'm pretty sure you can fill in the next ninety-three. To call this "predictable" would be the understatement of the year. That's not necessarily a bad thing; Hamlet's predictable, too. So is Dark Star. Problem is, The Johnsons isn't anything close to the level of Shakespearean tragedy. The dialogue is alarmingly silly, the characters would have to be better-drawn to be made of cardboard, and the plot stands alone in its utter disregard for anything resembling logic. When faced with such a script, the best directors will take it and play it for laughs, and every once in a while they get something great out of it (the aforementioned Dark Star and Return of the Living Dead being two classic examples). Van den Berg, however, gives us no indication at any point during the film that he and his characters are anything but serious. Even the cop doesn't crack wise. It's hard to believe anyone could have considered this a serious piece of filmmaking, but van den Berg did his best to make sure you'd at least try. That said, if the last two minutes of this film don't have you groaning in sheer agony, you've a stronger stomach than I. * ½ (rewatchability factor supplied solely by de la Bretoniere. Hubba hubba.)

A Classic!.......2002-01-06

This is indeed a classic. One for the record books. A must see. A frolicking romp amongst the forces of evil. After you watch this film, make sure you check out the director/writer commentary. You always know a film is a true classic when the director and writer laugh themselves into a hernia during specific scenes. Buy this immediately. You won't regret it.

A Wild Ride of a Horror Film--Silly, but Occasionally Scary.......2000-04-05

_The Johnsons_ is a very well-made film. I tried to imagine how this material might look in a low-budget American film--we're just lucky that a Dutch film company and crew put this together. The plot is a very strange one, and ultimately a bit silly, but there are many very effectively horrific moments. To be honest, the basic story reminded me quite a bit of _The Relic_, with primitive jungle tribes and superstitions manifesting themselves in a modern, urban setting. The DVD has informative commentary tracks by the director and the co-writers and you can choose to watch it in Dutch or English (I'd recommend Dutch with English subtitles). This really is a pretty fun film and if you watch with the right frame of mind, I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

DVD:

DVD

DVD

DVD

What's the Worst That Could Happen?

Clean, Shaven

Royal Bed (REGION 1) (NTSC)

DVD: Empires - The Greeks: Crucible of Civilization

The Watcher