Species 2

Starring:Michael Madsen, Natasha Henstridge, Marg Helgenberger, Mykelti Williamson, George Dzundza, James Cromwell, Justin Lazard, Myriam Cyr, Sarah Wynter, Baxter Harris, Scott Morgan, Nancy La Scala, Raquel Gardner, Henderson Forsythe, Robert Hogan, Ted Sutton, Gwendolyn Briley-Strand, Valerie Karasek, Jane Beard, Nancy Young
Director: Peter Medak
Studio: MGM (Video & DVD)
Product Type: DVD

Amazon.com

Like any IMAX movie, Coral Reef Adventure is so vivid, vast, and colorful that you can't help but be astonished by its visual splendor. But this undersea exploration has a deeper, more serious agenda as well, warning its viewers that the natural magnificence of the world's most impressive coral reefs is, in most cases, a mere 30 years away from extinction due to the devastating effects of global (and oceanic) warming. Whether or not that timeframe is accurate (and there's not enough solid science presented here to prove it either way), it's tragically obvious that we are in the process of losing entire ecosystems that cannot be replaced, and when you witness these awesome coral reefs in their still-thriving vitality, you experience a sense of urgent responsibility toward our stewardship of planet Earth. By showing us the commitment and potentially life-threatening work of reef explorers and world-class undersea cinematographers Howard and Michele Hall, the film provides an all-access pass to some of the most exotic, playful, and dangerous creatures in the ocean, presented with the kind of intense, almost three-dimensional clarity that can only be achieved in the IMAX format. And while the giant-screen awesomeness of IMAX is lost in translation to DVD, Coral Reef Adventure offers the best-to-date use (on disc 2 of this two-disc set) of High Definition DVD-ROM formatting. For PC users equipped with Windows XP and Windows Media Player 9 series (or later) software, the amazing images in Coral Reef Adventure achieve an almost life-like resolution. The ultimate conclusion remains: If we don't do something to protect these delicate, endangered wonders of nature, we will lose a part of ourselves. --Jeff Shannon

Description

Take a once in a lifetime journey across the South Pacific for a spectacular IMAX adventure. Joy; ecstasy; a spiritual high: these words describe the exhilaration of diving a pristine coral reef, and ocean explorers Howard and Michele Hall bring their love of the ocean into action. With Jean-Michael Cousteau, deep reef scientist Richard Pyle and Fijian diver Rusi Vulakoro, they explore and capture on film the dazzling underwater world of coral reefs, magical places here on Earth. This tropical excursion through the South Pacific will surprise and delight you as you fall in love with the reefs, and your heart will ache at the tragic, irretrievable loss of these fragile worlds. Disc 2 includes the complete feature in Microsoft Windows Media Video High Definition, playable on your PC.

Customer Reviews:

Coral Reef.......2007-06-07

I was very disappointed with this video. I was looking forward to seeing footage of coral reefs on the ocean floor, but what they gave was an ecological view of what happens when "man" doesn't take care of what is there. I'm always looking for good educational videos. If I had been teaching ecology, that would be one thing, but I was looking for live footage of coral reefs.

An excellent view.......2007-05-24

This film is as absolute delight from start to finish. It is basically eye candy and education thrown together into one. The spectacular views of the underwater world are simply breathtaking. What else can I say? Superb!

Very Satisfied.......2007-05-23

We are very happy with the video. The graphics and music is awesome! I found it very entertaining as well as educational. Thank you.

4 of 5 due to used DRM.......2007-04-10

This movie is great and the picture is awesome and I bought it due to the 2nd disc in HD (in WMVHD). Picture is so crisp and simply beautiful. You'll face problems if you would like to wath the HD content on your Mac - due to the fact that main movie is protected with DRM and it could run only from Windows.

HD.......2007-04-05

I purchased this DVD for the 1080 and 720 resolutions through Windows Media player to shoot through my projector. The picture is awesome in HD. It does take a newer processor to run it though. My XP 2600+ chip had problems doing the 1080, but my 3800+ dual core with 2mb of PC 800 RAM ran it flawlessly. I plan to purchase more IMAX videos that include the HD disc. Until the Blue Ray and HD ROM's come down in price, this is a really good option for running/seeing a HD image.

Average customer rating:

Doolittle does it again!
Better than the original! Eddie Murphey at his best!
Dr. Dolittle 2
Cute! Very Cute!
Extremely Disappointing

Dr. Dolittle 2
Starring: Eddie Murphy , Kristen Wilson , Raven (VII) , Kyla Pratt (II) , and Lil' Zane
Director: Steve Carr (III)
Manufacturer: 20th Century Fox
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Comedy | Genres | DVD | Video

DVDs Under $7.49 | Today's Deals in DVD | Special Features | DVD | Video

( D ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
Similar Items:

Dr. Dolittle
Doctor Dolittle 3
Nutty Professor II - The Klumps (Collector's Edition)
Daddy Day Care (Special Edition)
The Nutty Professor

ASIN: B00005NRNV
Release Date: 2001-10-23

Amazon.com

It's only a marginal improvement, but Dr. Dolittle 2 defies the odds by rising above its popular 1998 predecessor (and once again, let's not confuse these movies with the earlier Rex Harrison musical). Eddie Murphy cakewalks through his title role with the confident professionalism of a comedian who knows when to share the spotlight--especially when he's being upstaged by a bunch of animals who steal all the punch lines. And once again the movie's aimed at a preteen audience, so many of those punch lines involve flatulence, bodily functions, and frequent use of the word butt.

The difference this time: Dr. Dolittle has settled into his talk-to-the-animals routine; his 16-year-old daughter (Raven-Symone) is getting to be a feisty handful (it turns out she's coping with a hereditary gift); and his lawyer wife (Kristen Wilson) is representing him in a trial against corporate villains who want to clear-cut a local forest. Naturally, the local critter mafia (their Don is a beaver... fugeddaboutit!) want Dolittle to fight for their cause, and this involves the successful mating of an endangered bear and a domesticated circus bear who's forgotten all the bear necessities of life in the wild. The bears are voiced by Lisa Kudrow and Steve Zahn, and they almost steal the show, but the whole menagerie (with digitally animated "talking") is equally amusing. Adults might wish that the filmmakers had tried harder to make a truly memorable sequel, but this is a movie for kids, and they're going to love it without quibbling. --Jeff Shannon

Description

Superstar Eddie Murphy is back as Dolittle, the beloved doctor with the up-ROAR-ious critter-communicating talents. This time around Dolittle plays Cupid to bumbling circus bear to help a group of forest creatures save their habitat. With the aid of his mangy, madcap animal friends, Dolittle must teach this overgrown teddy the ways of true romance in time to save his species and his home!

Customer Reviews:

Doolittle does it again!.......2006-07-13

We loved the first movie, so when the 2nd came out, it had a lot to live up to. It was as hysterical as the first... very well done! A "must" have!!

Better than the original! Eddie Murphey at his best!.......2006-05-05

Eddie Murphey is truly the doctor, the doctor of comedy that is! This is the series to see if you need to laugh, if you love to laugh even! I was watching these because I like Raven-Symone (she plays one of his daughters). Raven-Symone is from Disney Channel's "That's So Raven". Also, the animal voices, many of them are very familiar (like Chris Rock and Cedric the Entertainer). If you like one and two, then you might want to check out "Dr. Doolittle 3". No, it does not feature Eddie Murphey unfortunately. However, this movie is the doctor for your comedy ills!

Dr. Dolittle 2.......2005-11-02

The movie "Dr.Dolitle" was a movie directed by Steve Carr which both childen and adults will like it.It was a very interesting movie because a doctor call Dolittle was able to communicate with animals.
Dr.Dolittle had to make a type of endangered bear to give birth in order to save the forest where many types of species of animalss lived in. But at first, the male bear was anti-social not romantic and do not know how to survive in the wild, it was very playful and likes to sing songs which sounded terrible. So it was long before they began to fall for each other, as the female bear was actually attached.
The movie was very funny when the male bear was climbing on a broken tree branch, which had a bee hive. He just wanted to fulfil the female bear's wish in being a courageous bear. Dr. Dolittle advised him not to climb.Andwhen the bear reached the top,the bees in the hive stinged them.
Overall, I would give the movie 3 out of 5.
1h and 28min
PG

Cute! Very Cute!.......2005-03-21

I suppose this was not as entertaining as the first Dr.Dolittle but we certainly enjoyed it. Haven't you ever wondered what animals would say if they could talk? It's always fun to imagine that and as with the first you get to hear them.
It's funny and I liked the bears; I thought they were adorable.
The acting was good, as was the storyline and bringing in some human interest, such as problems with the doctors daughter was great. All in all we enjoyed this movie and think you will as well.

Extremely Disappointing.......2005-02-20

I love Eddie Murphy, and I loved Dr. Doolittle! The previews of Dr. D II looked so funny, I couldn't wait to see it. Well, I just saw it, and my mind has still not recovered.

Dr. Doolittle 2 is one of the worst films I have ever seen. The story and dialouge are so mind-numbing, even the animated Murphy and Raven Symone, who plays his teenage daughter, couldn't salvage it. The story revolves around Dr. Doolittle trying to save the patch of forest behind his house from a land-hungry developer. To do this, Doolittle must rehab a tame bear and make him wild, because this bear is an endangered species, and if he lives in the forest, the developer can't touch it. Sounds kind of cute . . . it's not.

The bear acts and sounds like a washed up Vegas lounge singer. His whiny voice (Steve Zahn) is so annoying that even I, a passionate animal lover, could not summon a shred of sympathy for this bear. And talk about long. This whole thin storyline is dragged out for ninety minutes until I writhed in pain. And the other animals! A sad, alcoholic French monkey, a chamelon with a horrible Mexican accent, and an abusive bear and his passive female bear. When the bear is not whining, a dog is narrating the whole film in another nasal, bland voice with HORRIBLE dialouge.

A subplot involves his daughter rebelling and liking a boyfriend who is a complete idiot, is dropped off by a pizza delivery car and asks to stay two nights. Murphy actually acquieses. What an intelligent, lovely girl like Raven would see in this sorry homie is completely unbelievable.

It is hard to believe people (and animals) are going hungry when millions were wasted on this fart of a film. It seemed like the voice actors were embarrased to be saying such stupid dialouge, and that the animal actors were embarrased to be acting such stupid roles - and I don't blame them.

Most Extreme Season 1 - Episode 2: Gluttons

Average customer rating:

Most Extreme Season 1 - Episode 2: Gluttons

Manufacturer: Discovery
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Nature & Wildlife | Special Interests | Genres | DVD | Video

( M ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video

Most Extreme Season 1 - Episode 1: Jumpers
Most Extreme Season 1 - Episode 3: Speed
Most Extreme Season 1 - Episode 5: Cheats
National Geographic Wildlife Collection (4pc)
Happily N'ever After (Widescreen Edition)

ASIN: B000KGGOHC
Release Date: 2006-12-01

Average customer rating:

LIKE FATHER...LIKE DAUGHTER...

Dr Dolittle 2 (Widescreen Edition)
Starring: Eddie Murphy , Kristen Wilson , Raven (VII) , Kyla Pratt (II) , and Lil' Zane
Director: Steve Carr (III)
Manufacturer: 20th Century Fox
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Comedy | Genres | DVD | Video

DVDs Under $7.49 | Today's Deals in DVD | Special Features | DVD | Video

( D ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
Similar Items:

Dr. Dolittle
Doctor Dolittle 3
American Pie 2 - Unrated (Widescreen Collector's Edition)
American Wedding - Unrated (Widescreen Collector's Edition)
Showtime (Widescreen Edition)

ASIN: B00026ZDYA
Release Date: 2004-10-19

Description

Customer Reviews:

LIKE FATHER...LIKE DAUGHTER..........2006-10-26

This is a moderately entertaining film that is fun for the whole family. It features Eddie Murphy as Dr. Dolittle, reprising his original role. This time Dr. Doolittle displays an interest in environmental issues, as he tries to save the forest by playing matchmaker between Ava, a bear in the wild, and Archie, a circus bear who has gotten soft and is trying to get used to living in the wild. Ultimately, Dr. Dolittle is victorious over the corporate expansionists who sought to decimate the forest.

There are some very amusing moments with the animals. There are also some funny moments as Dr. Dolittle tries to cope with his sixteen year old daughter just being a teenager. Much to his delight and surprise, however, it turns out that she appears to have inherited his unique ability to communicate with animals. Still, this film is simply not as good as the prequel.

This DVD provides picure perfect visuals, as well as excellent sound. The disc also has some nice extra features, such as a kid's guide to grizzlies and the director's commentary. This is a value packed DVD.

Average customer rating:

pretty good
A Decade Later, It Still Stinks!
You'll like it if you've NEVER seen a movie before!
CARNOSAUR 3
My Least Favorite of the Three

Primal Species [Region 2]

ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

( P ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video

Carnosaur II
Carnosaur
Spiders
Arachnia
Raptor

ASIN: B00004CZKR

Customer Reviews:

pretty good.......2007-05-27

i really like this movie, though i can't say it's perfect. but i think they did a pretty good job,luckily i watched this on the SCI FI channel,and boy was it worth sitting down for 2 hours,and there is even a carnosaur 4,or "raptor" i own it. but i especially liked the rubbery plastic dinosaurs, i loved the t rex and i also loved seeing the plastic monster munching on people. all in all i gave his flick a 2 of 5 it's not perfect but it's pretty good. my advise, watch it.

A Decade Later, It Still Stinks!.......2007-04-03

This may be Scott Valentine's best dramatic performance yet. And it's a darn shame. Ouch.

So you take some marines and other military guys, ala Commando or Predator, add the spitfire Hispanic girl (who, of course, dies) ala Aliens and Resident Evil. Stir in two scoops of Raptors, ala Jurassic Park. Blend one scene of shooting up the monsters eggs (Aliens again). Add a dollop of Jaws, by pushing a bomb or air tank into the montster's mouth, for explosive effect. Churn in 20,000 gallons of bad acting and cliche plot. The perfect recipe for a Bad Movie!

They should pay YOU to watch this film. But it would never be enough.

You'll like it if you've NEVER seen a movie before!.......2006-11-14

If this is your first time experiencing the wonders of cinema, if
you've never seen a "Moving Picture" before, you'll think this movie is
a child of the gods. BUT if you've seen a movie, a TV show, even Barney
the Dinosaur, then you won't be very impressed by this film. Heck
Barney the dinosaur was even more realistic than the dinos in this
flick.

Now I like B movies. I just watched "The Giant Gila Monster" right
before I watched this swill, and I liked that movie much better. It
works as a B movie. It has lamer dialog,hokier acting, cheesier effects
and an honest to gosh real Gila Monster as the monster! Carno 3 just
doesn't pack much of a B movie punch. It has some gore, and that
Polchek guy comes close to being funny a few times but this movie is
underwhelming, almost....flaccid. It's the Little Engine That Couldn't
of Dinosaur movies.
I'm not saying you shouldn't watch the movie. Some people can watch gum drying on a sidewalk and feel entertained. If you're one of those people, then give this movie a shot.

CARNOSAUR 3.......2006-05-28

Yes, the series has been fun, but when will they stop! I think it should have stopped at number 2, but that is my opinion. Anyway, I watched this film on tv, and...well, what can I say? It is a low- budget film about dinos. Now, the dinosaurs may look fake, but they do a good jod on getting people to 'jump' out of their seats. The story is miner. Sometimes you can tell what is going on, but sometimes your saying "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?". The goofs in the film are sometimes not even noticable, but sometime...you get the picture. The series has always been gory, and this film is very gory. If you were to fight over an argument on which film is better, Jurrassic Park 3 or Carnosaur 3, I think Carnosaur 3 would win. Do to the fact the Jurrassic Park 3 is terrible and the fact that Carnosaur 3 has better acting and story. Eacj film has almost the same story, but been changed around. In the Jurrassic Park franchise, It is always the same story. Anyway, If you really like the series, buy this one as well. It is just as good as the first two.

My Least Favorite of the Three.......2006-01-08

I don't know what it is, maybe Carnosaur has finally run it's course, but this wasn't at all the best out of the series. The dinosaurs look a little better than in the previous two, but the film doesn't really go anywhere. It's just a rehashing of the previous films. Scott Valentine does a horrible impersonation of Sylvester Stallone and it is very clear that he is trying to do so from the facial looks to the talking, pure Stallone. Like I've said in a previous review, B-rated movies aren't meant to be Oscar winners, but even for a B-rated movie it's pretty bad.

Michael McDonald from Mad TV is on Carnosaur once again, this time towards the beginning

Average customer rating:

HOW TO CATCH STRIPED BASS VOL. 2

Manufacturer: Bennett Marine Video
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Special Interests | Genres | DVD | Video

( H ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video

HOW TO CATCH STRIPED BASS

ASIN: B000LZ5ACW
Release Date: 2006-12-14

Description

In this exciting and informative DVD, Dr. Jim adds new tips and techniques for catching striped bass. Discover the best new rods, reels, bait and tackle to use along with specific catching techniques and the best bait to increase your chances of success.

Average customer rating:

Species [Region 2]
Starring: Ben Kingsley , Michael Madsen , Alfred Molina , Forest Whitaker , and Marg Helgenberger
Director: Roger Donaldson
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

( S ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
ASIN: B00004CX4W

Average customer rating:

Species [Region 2]
Starring: Ben Kingsley , Michael Madsen , Alfred Molina , Forest Whitaker , and Marg Helgenberger
Director: Roger Donaldson
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

( S ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
ASIN: B00004RYEC

Average customer rating:

RETURN OF THE RUBBER SUITS
B Movie Dreams
An absolute shower!
Classic, cheesy B movie

Deadly Species [Region 2]
Starring: Pete Penuel , Allison Adams , Brian Minyard , Jeff Brozovich , and William Cefalo
Director: Daniel Springen
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

( D ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video

The Marsh
Pterodactyl

ASIN: B00006HCQT

Customer Reviews:

RETURN OF THE RUBBER SUITS.......2004-12-05

You'd think in a movie made in 2000, you wouldnt expect to see monsters in rubber suits. WRONG! That's only one of the many ingredients in this almost campy horror flick. DEADLY SPECIES gives us the usual billionaire business man out on a mysterious expedition. A kindly professor, his wife and several of his "best" students, who all act like prepubescent idiots. Only the studly bodyguard for the businessman exudes any kind of presence, and his role is certainly not challenging. A muddled plot, bad pacing and just all around foolishness make DEADLY SPECIES a rental on an All Night Bad Movie Fest.

B Movie Dreams.......2004-07-08

"Deadly Species" was made for one reason, to make money off the straight to video market. It contains every cliche in the book. I also wondered where the originality of B movie filmmakers went? "Deadly Species" is no where near my type of film, but I always give credit where credit is due, at least the filmmakers created a movie that's available to public. They completed what they set off to do, even if it involved a native tribe, naked women, rubber guns, bad acting and mutant gators.

An absolute shower!.......2003-07-21

What posessed me to buy this drivel I don't know. It was so bad it could have been made by Aaron Spelling. A combination of bad acting, bad script, bad direction/makeup/production. Completely lacking in tension or horror and full of cliches.
Until now the worst film I had ever seen was "Raising Arizona" - until now! Thank goodness there were no extras - the mind boggles as to what they might have done with a "making of"!
Pity that Amazon.com doesn't permit no stars in the review - cos that's what this would have scored.

Classic, cheesy B movie.......2003-05-06

As only the B&W classic drive-in movies could do, or a Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie could do, this is the classic, cheesy,and fun B movie. Deadly Species is funny and dopey and almost good. It's got all the elements.....bad sound, bad music, gratutious nude scenes with pretty girls, some blood and gore, and of course foam-rubber customed men running around killing people. It won't be up for any awards but Deadly Species is a fun movie to sit around and make fun of on a Saturday night with some friends, some chips and beer.

Average customer rating:

Cheezee
Best of the worst....or worst of the best bad movies....you decide..
Best movie ever
Oh my god, I loved this movie!! Very well done!
The horror...the horror

Altered Species [Region 2]
Starring: Allen Lee Haff , Leah Rowan , Guy Vieg , Robert Broughton , and Richard Peterson
Director: Miles Feldman
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Thrillers | Mystery & Suspense | Genres | DVD | Video

( A ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
Similar Items:

Vicious
Deep Evil
Killer Rats
The Cave (Widescreen Edition)
Insecticidal

ASIN: B00009RS0U

Customer Reviews:

Cheezee.......2007-06-16

This ratty little fright-flick is cheesy at best. The story follows the aftermath of a lab accident, in which the furry subjects are exposed to a chemical goop that turns them into voracious, 200-lb killers who render movie producers incapable of correct spelling.

Only for the diehard "animals gone bad" film fanatics.

Best of the worst....or worst of the best bad movies....you decide.........2006-12-09

If you like REALLY bad horror movies, this is the one for you! This is serious "So bad it's good" material, on a "Worst of the worst" scale. It's monumentally horiffic in every way. It's about mutant rats and of course, they start killing everyone...Great stuff...You name it, it has it, all the elements that make a horrible horror movie: Cheesy script, bad acting, gratuitous sex scene, bad gore, fake looking rat suit, fake sounding dialogue, holes in the storyline and super corny ending. The even more hilarious thing to do is to watch it with the directors commentary on the DVD! It's priceless! Lines like, "We had to try to make the rats look scary, so we blew cold air on them to make them run." I laughed so hard...And so will you if this is your thing. If you are looking for a 'good' horror movie don't watch this and don't watch it if you want to be scared. It's too freaking funny to be scary!

Best movie ever.......2006-01-27

Everybody is right about this movie. It has terrible special effects, a guy in a giant rat suit, and mistakes in the movie that don't even begin to make sense.

So why did I rate it a five?

Come on people, the title is "Rodentz", spelled with a Z, did you expect it to be a good movie? I rented this with a bunch of friends because we wanted to watch a crappy sci-fi movie, and thats exactly what we got. This movie is halarious when you want it to be, and that is why I rated it a five. Best movie ever

Oh my god, I loved this movie!! Very well done!.......2005-04-05

So much action, great special effects! And the plotline, so intriguing!!

Um, wait, I thought I was reviewing Matrix Reloaded. Oh sorry, what's this movie?

Oh Rodentz. Well maybe I will keep the 5 stars, and say some good stuff. I thought that guy in the large rat suit was pretty good. And the erector set robotic rat at the beginning was super cool.

I didn't even mind seeing the same scene over and over, I mean if it is good-why not? We saw movie-greatness when we saw people walking through corridors one thousand times-that was very nice.

Just think of the camera work...

And the fuzzy slippers and stuffed animals that were attacking the people, those were pretty scary I thought! I don't think I'm going to open my dresser drawers for a good long time now.

I enjoyed seeing the large rat tail also, that was pure entertainment. Oh my gosh this would've been cool to see on the big screen, just think-an even bigger tail!

I liked this movie so much, I think I'm going to put in in my car, and try out my own amazing pyrotechnics, and I'll smile as my car and the DVD go up in flames. Thank god those two survived. I can't wait for Rodentz-The Rise of the Machines.

Starring Matthew Broderick as the guy in the Rat Suit.

The horror...the horror.......2004-04-20

"Rodentz," also known as "Altered Species," is one of those commodities with which lovers of bad cinema so often have a love/hate relationship. In fact, the movie could well stand as the poster child for wildly over the top, awful B-budget horror movies. The director and producers made no effort whatsoever to take any of the proceedings seriously, arguably a wise move on their part considering the atrocious levels every aspect of this film achieves. I imagine the film tried to mimic, and probably spoof in the process, every zero budget monster film made from the 1940s on, but I really, REALLY wished it hadn't failed so miserably. Why is it that every "monster" or "creatures gone mad" film released in the last few years has a low budget, bad acting, and horrible pacing? Why, when the idea of raging sharks, mad octopi, and mutated crocodiles crosses somebody's mind in Hollywood does it automatically mean a straight to video release? How many "Shark Attack" films will we have to wade through before someone gets the formula right? Well, I guess I am just as much to blame for the continued release of these terrible pictures as everyone else. After all, I rented "Rodentz" along with millions of other sheep.

"Rodentz" does have a theme: never pour experimental growth hormones in a sink. When weary graduate student Walter dumps a beaker full of the stuff down the drain, hilarity ensues in the form of giant killer rats. Walt should have known better than to do something this stupid, but he's tired after working hours and hours on Professor Irwin's controversial growth experiment. Irwin, a cantankerous old coot who spends most of his short screen time barking orders at Walt and insisting his hormone is "fine," promptly disappears after searching for his lost cat. So does an alky janitor. And so will a lot more people by the time the movie judders to an excruciating halt an eternity later. In the meantime, Walt has little idea of the carnage he has unwittingly released on the world. He continues to studiously monitor the progress of dozens of rats in cages spread across the laboratory, blithely unaware that the formula is far from "fine" and that crazed rats are doing the cha-cha on the janitor and the professor in other parts of the building. Oh sure, a few warning signs appear. One of the rats, for instance, begins to gain weight at a frightening pace after receiving an injection of the tainted hormone. Don't worry, though. Walt is only slightly concerned about this alarming development. Irwin, before his untimely passing, isn't concerned at all.

Meanwhile, a group of Walt's friends (sigh) head out for some evening fun. With nothing more than that youthful insouciance, a jug of tequila, and a gallon of hair gel, Walt's pals head over to the lab to pick up their hardworking amigo. The group consists of Walter's girlfriend, another girl who fulfills the obligatory "catty" role, and two loud mouthed jerks. Well soused by the time they arrive to get Walt, they bully their way into the lab in an effort to convince the grad student to join them. Walter, unaware that Irwin expired some time ago, tries to keep them out. But you know how it is when a script calls for mayhem; the Chinese army couldn't keep these four kids out of trouble. Predictably, oh so predictably, the carnage begins. The catty girl is the first one to run into the king daddy of the mutated rats, a creature grown to a height of roughly seven feet with teeth the size of daggers. She's one of the lucky ones, though, despite having her face completely chewed away. At least she gets the chance to bow out of this movie early on, a chance denied to Walt and his girlfriend. Panic follows, as do chase scenes and the mandatory "here's how we can save the world from the rats" idea before the movie mercifully ends. I will never, never manage to burn that cheesy image of a seven foot tall burned rat riding on top of a van. Somebody help me. Please.

It is difficult to put my finger on one specific nightmare that makes "Rodentz" such a forgettable picture, but I'll try. Let's start with the acting. It's bad, and not in a "so bad, it's good" way. I could forgive a film if the actors made me laugh with over the top performances. Instead, this film's thespians manage to irritate on a regular basis. Special mention goes to the Gary character; a guy who gets so far under your skin it would take a chainsaw to get the memory of him out. He's annoying in the extreme, and may well rank as one of the most annoying characters in the history of B moviedom. The horror of Gary nearly obscures the many other faults of the film, but not quite. Plot holes abound (How did the rats know how to chew through the phone lines? How did the power come back on?), and the editing is uniformly poor (check out those lousy reaction shots). The CGI effects look rather pathetic, too. Overall, I would say "Rodentz" is an experience akin to having a root canal without any anesthesia.

The DVD has a commentary track from the director, but I couldn't bear to listen to it. I've decided to abandon my usual "Oh the humanity" tag line for a one star movie review starting with "Rodentz." In its place, I'm going to start using "The horror...the horror" from "Apocalypse Now." I think that line, summing up all the mental trauma of senseless brutality in war on the human mind, is an adequate one to describe this and other cinematic atrocities. You'd do well to stay far away from "Rodentz."

DVD:

DVD

DVD

DVD

Sherlock Holmes and the Woman in Green (Colorized / Black and White)

Mysteries of Magic

Warlock [1989]

DVD: Free to Be You and Me

Midnight Warrior