The Sex Monster

Starring:Stephen Baldwin, Anita Barone, Missy Crider, Robin Curtis, Melissa Denton, Karen Dyer (II), Joanna Heimbold, Mariel Hemingway, RenÃ©e Humphrey, James R. Killeen, Christopher Lawford, Nancy Mura, Marisol Nichols, Taylor Nichols, Kevin Pollak, Judy Scheer, Noah Stone, Holland Taylor, Kara Zediker
Studio: Lions Gate
Product Type: DVD

Average customer rating:

Stylish Directing Saves A Flat Story
If you're not a dog person you're a......
Erotic & Eerie***possible spoiler alert***
Cat People Review
Cat people or kitties in training?

Cat People
Starring: Nastassja Kinski , Malcolm McDowell , John Heard , Annette O'Toole , and Ruby Dee
Director: Paul Schrader
Manufacturer: Universal Studios
ProductGroup: DVD
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The Hunger
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Cat People: Original Soundtrack

ASIN: B000069HZO
Release Date: 2002-08-27

Amazon.com

Paul Schrader, the director of American Gigolo, brought a similar kind of sexual chic to this explicit horror movie. A remake of the beautiful, haunting 1942 Cat People, this version takes off from the same idea: that a woman (Nastassja Kinski), a member of a race of feline humans, will revert to her animalistic self when she has sex. Arriving to meet her brother (Malcolm McDowell) in New Orleans, she finds herself disturbed by his sexual presence. A zoo curator (John Heard) becomes fascinated by her, but he will discover that her kittenish ways are just the tip of the claw. Schrader dresses the story up in a stylish, glossy production, keyed on Kinski's green-eyed, thick-lipped beauty; it's hard to think of another actress in 1982 who could so immediately suggest a cat walking on two legs. Luckily Kinski had a European attitude toward her body, because this film has plenty of poster-art nudity. There's also lots of gore and some wacky flashbacks to the ancient tribe of cat people, who hold rituals in an orange desert while Giorgio Moroder's music plays. Cat People doesn't really make all this come together, but it's always interesting to look at, and the dreadful mood lingers. --Robert Horton

Customer Reviews:

Stylish Directing Saves A Flat Story.......2007-06-13

The plot: A beautiful 20 year old orphan Nastassja Kinski is reunited with her brother, Malcolm McDowell in New Orleans. Without explanation McDowell disappears and is sought for cannibalizing prostitutes.

Kinski ends up falling for zoologist John Heard whom handles large cats at the local zoo. Predictably the zoo's jaguar turns out to in fact be McDowell who escapes and reveals to Kinski how their family is cursed to turn into jaguars every time they make love. Only the act of murdering a human can return them to form. Hence the only safe sex is inbreeding. While McDowell kills without conscious the virgin Kinski despises her affliction.

This remake of the 1942 cult classic could should have come up with better title.

While the plot is bland the directing keeps it alive, similar to Michael Mann's `Manhunter' the New Orleans setting is used to its full effect as well as David Bowie's haunting score.

The opening sequence is noting short of awesome. In a haze of red we see an ancient civilization sacrificing children to jaguars by tying them to a grotesque tree without fruit or leaves. It is unclear if they are to be eaten by or mate with the jaguars. But this sacrifice creates the cat people.

I was astounded that this opening sequence of a mystical tree was in fact plagiarized by the film `The Exorcism of Emily Rose.'

A fair warning about `Cat People', everyone gets naked. Yes, everyone. While nudity is nothing new to McDowell and Kinski, John Heard and even Annette O'Toole's exposure is shocking. I wonder why O'Toole never used her assets to further her career.

If you're not a dog person you're a.............2007-06-12

CAT PEOPLE is basically a cross between a werewolf movie & a vampire movie. Like a werewolf movie, it involves people transforming into animals (in this case, black panthers). Like a vampire movie, it is heavy on eroticism and sensuality.

The film stars Nastassja Kinski as a young woman who goes to visit her brother (Malcom McDowell) for the first time in many years. She soon finds out that she carries the family "curse" of going into a metamorphosis and becoming a leapord.

Nastassja is PERFECT for this part as she has a slender, curvy, feline body. It matches up with her becoming a leapord very nicely. Annette O'Toole is quite attractive too, with more of a girl-next-door type of beauty. Best of all, both girls look absolutely fantastic topless!

If you like erotic thrillers / werewolf movies / vampire movies, my guess is that CAT PEOPLE will more than likely be to your liking. It is sultry, sexy and entertaining in a feline sort of way.

Erotic & Eerie***possible spoiler alert***.......2007-05-19

Immediately Giorgio Moroder's score captures you in the darkness with
its sensual rhythms, then Schrader entices us into a labyrinthine
journey of sex and death seen through the eyes of the dark & beautiful
Irena (Kinski). Her brother Paul, played by a Malcom McDowell welcomes
Irena to New Orleans ( a perfect location for this erotic & fetishistic
tale ) dressed as a priest, this is their first 'reunion' since infancy
& orphanage. Paul takes her home and introduces her to his housekeeper
Female (played by the great Ruby Dee). Their joy is short lived, as
Paul's incestuous overtures are rebuffed by an innocent Irena and his
disappearance coincides with a visit by the police to investigate
Paul's possible involvement in a 'ritualistic' murder involving a
panther. Female is arrested as a possible accomplice to Paul's crimes.
In jail, she advices Irena to 'not love' and 'pretend the world is what
men believe it to be'. Irena is quickly taken in by Oliver ( John Heard
), curator of the New Orleans Zoo, after he startles her sketching a
recently captured black panther. Irena settles into a life working at
the zoo and begins a relationship with Oliver, much to the dismay of
Alice ( Annette O'Toole ), ostensibly Oliver's love interest until
Irena's arrival. Paul resurfaces after a tragic attack by the panther
on a zoo keeper (played by Ed Begley, Jr.) in front of Irena, Alice &
Oliver. Paul's presence is now menacing and his previous advances are
now violent and threatening. He tells Irena that 'only she can save
him': by being with him as they are like their parents- brother &
sister and of an ancient and incestuous race, unable to mate with only
their own kind, lest they transform-returning to human form only after
killing. Schrader captures the dark, sensual and moody atmosphere of
the New Orleans night with this tale of occult, sex, blood &
lycanthropy.

Cat People Review.......2007-03-25

I love this movie. Great music, Nastassja Kinski is Hot. Very sexy and stylish.

Cat people or kitties in training?.......2007-03-14

This movie is interesting enough to watch, but in the end, I felt a need for more. First off, considering that technically it was a remake of the 1942 movie of the same title, it's much better than the original. I don't think that should do a sequel, unless it was in the format of a prequel (then they could have a younger guy for Malcolm MacDowell's role, cause he's definitely too old to play young now). I would like to know how MacDowell's character came to realize what he was and how he accepted to live the life that he did.

Average customer rating:

Weak Masters of Horror entry
What's Next? "Buck Man"?
Please enter a title for your review
John Landis is a Master Storyteller
One of the best in the series

Masters of Horror - Deer Woman
Starring: Brian Benben
Director: John Landis
Manufacturer: Starz / Anchor Bay
ProductGroup: DVD
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ASIN: B000F3UACK
Release Date: 2006-06-27

Description

Detective Dwight Faraday (Brian Benben) is a burntout cop demoted to the `weird calls' desk until a series of bizarre murders suddenly grabs his attention: Several men killed by massive blunt force trauma while in a state of sexual arousal, all last seen in the company of a sexy Native American woman (Cinthia Moura). But when it's discovered that these corpses were trampled into hamburger by what appear to be hooves, Faraday must hunt a killer who may not be totally human.Will one cynical cop be caught like a deer in the headlights or has a horrifying seductress risen from legend to slaughter the horny? Anthony Griffith co-stars in this erotic horror comedy co-written and directed by John Landis (ANIMAL HOUSE,THE BLUES BROTHERS) and featuring grisly gore effects by Gregory Nicotero & Howard Berger (KILL BILL, LAND OF THE DEAD, CHRONICLES OF NARNIA).

Customer Reviews:

Weak Masters of Horror entry.......2007-04-11

A burned out cop (Brian Benben) is investigating the deaths of men who seem to have been trampled to death by a huge deer. As he investigates he finds a Native American myth that actually makes the evidence make some sense. So this is John Landis's contribution to the Maters of Horror series? To say the least I was not too impressed. I understand he made one widely accepted horror classic in his career ("An American Werewolf in London"); but "Deer Woman" really wasn't that good, I didn't like it. This one is just a slight variation on the werewolf myth. Anyway, there were a few more problems I just couldn't get over. One was that the acting was pretty bad, though it's hard to fault the actors because I quickly found there wasn't much script to work with. The story was silly, and I mean that I think it was made for the Masters of Comedy series. Why was the woman murdering the men? The script actually went so far as to say, "why dose she need a reason?" I am sorry, I just can't recommend this to anyone. Sorry. Yes, I am ready for the hate mail now.

What's Next? "Buck Man"?.......2007-04-04

Perhaps "Deer Woman" was made because the makers of the "Masters of Horror" series realized that their brainchild had turned into a bit of a joke. After having put out several unintentionally funny "horror" pieces, they must've decided to actually TRY to be funny, because "Deer Woman" is a just a few chuckles shy of a laugh riot.

Detective Dwight Faraday (played perfectly by "Dream On"s Brian Benben) is a cliched cop-in-decline, suffering emotionally over the death of his partner and demoted-due-to-distrees to the Animal Attack division in his department. Bodies -- or, rather, large piles of goo that once were bodies -- begin to turn up. Hoof prints? Corpses with aroused genitalia? Why, it must be a Deer Woman!

When fleshing this theory out, Detective Faraday and his partner Jacob (also perfectly played by Anthony Griffith) are in a casino, and their brainstorm is assisted by a Native American employee, who tells them about the old Indian myth of the Deer Woman. "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard," Jacob says after the details are explained. "Hey," the casino worker says, "it's just a story."

Right. John Landis, director of both "An American Werewolf in London" and "The Three Amigos," has no delusions of being a "master of horror." He keeps it light and fast, and his cast plays it spot-on in every scene. It's enjoyable to watch a director as talented as Landis just goof off for a bit, even if, in this series, it WOULD be nice to get at least ONE sincerely horrifying episode.

I'll trade watered-down scares ("Witch House" & "Chocolate") for quirky comedy any day (this comedy couldn't even be properly called "dark"). Landis doesn't really care how stupid the end result is (and it IS pretty stupid). When Faraday and Reed ask the casino employee why a deer woman might go around murdering horny men, the response is, "Why does everything have to have a 'why' with you people, you know? It's a woman with deer legs. Motive isn't really an issue here."

Amen, Mr. Landis. However, I do have to say that the one or two niggling little plot holes (spectral deer show up several times and are never explained or connected to the deer woman) got on my nerves, especially since the whole story had been so well-contained. And considering the vignette was providing solid laughs throughout, the ending was a vague letdown, with yet more phantom-esque elements thrown in inexplicably just before a non-conclusion fades to black. The episode ends with someone laughing to themself over the silliness of everything; it would've worked a lot better if Landis had come up with a great parting joke and left the laughing up to the audience.

Please enter a title for your review.......2007-03-10

This is what happens when you dig up a fossil whose last horror directing effort was 25 years ago and expect him to make anything relevent. His biggest error was in the scriptwriting, but considering nothing scary happens in it he made the best of it by directing fake scares at the viewer, slowly zooming in on a truck door for 30 seconds until it bursts open with a loud bang and starting a scene with a close up of a scalpel cutting skin during an autopsy. The unironic hardnosed detective character is a bore, and the quirky mortician is a cliche.
Then there's some comedic soft porn flashback speculation about what happened to the victim. Another fake scare with a mugger lunging out from an alley at the cop who then tells the standard issue cop story about how he blames himself for some past accident and that's why he's so consumed by his job. I kept waiting for the punchline.
There's countless options of creative things that could have done to make this movie/episode more interesting and entertaining that were overlooked out of blind loyalty to convention. It's mostly just a bore.

John Landis is a Master Storyteller.......2007-03-09

Native American myth meets modern horror story with a dash of the dark humor John Landis is famous for. A classic flawed hero, a very different femme fatale, a new twist on film noir featuring the conflict between man and nature. Definitely a darker view of gentle deer - Bambi's revenge.

One of the best in the series.......2006-12-24

Leave it to John Landis to help craft one of the best episodes in Showtime's Masters of Horror series. Landis, better known more for his comedies Animal House and Blues Brothers, as well as his horror classic An American Werewolf in London (and featuring a great in-joke as well), co-writes and directs this campy and gorey tale of a burned out detective (Dream On's Brian Benben) discovering a series of mutilated bodies that all expired during arousal and were apparently trampled to death. Soon enough, he and a patrolman (Anthony Griffith) are on the trail of a super sexy Native American woman (frequently topless newcomer Cinthia Moura) who is half deer. Featuring plenty of great humor and some grisly effects, Deer Woman is undoubtadly one of the most fun entries in the otherwise grim Masters of Horror. Keeping it's tongue firmly in cheek, Deer Woman illustrates much of what Landis has always done best: mixing thrills and laughs to a wonderful effect. All in all, if you're looking for a more light hearted, but nonetheless thrilling, entry in the Masters of Horror series, look no further.

Average customer rating:

This has that Stephen King feel
This is Barely a Horror Movie, but it is VERY Entertaining
Unless you are a fan of Stephen King's work, you can ignore this one
fun
A Snoozer, Not a Sleeper

Sleepwalkers
Starring: Brian Krause , Mädchen Amick , Alice Krige , Jim Haynie , and Cindy Pickett
Director: Mick Garris
Manufacturer: Sony Pictures
ProductGroup: DVD
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ASIN: B000053UIF
Release Date: 2001-01-16

Amazon.com

Stephen King's Sleepwalkers is about a half-human, half-cat race of shape shifters called, for no apparent reason, sleepwalkers. Hunky Charles Brady (Brian Krause) and his incestuous mother (Alice Krige) are sleepwalkers, and they've come to the small town of Travis, Indiana, where they've somehow acquired a nice house and false identities. They need virgin souls to survive and have fixated on local beauty Tanya (Madchen Amick from Twin Peaks). That's about it for the story--from then on it's a series of chase scenes full of badly done gore. King must have been sleepwalking himself when he wrote this screenplay--the dialogue is terrible, the characters are cardboard, and the plotting is clumsy. Combine that with mediocre acting, thoughtless direction, slapdash editing, and cheesy special effects, and you have Sleepwalkers. Amick comes off reasonably well and there are cameos by King, Clive Barker, and horror directors John Landis (An American Werewolf in London), Joe Dante (Gremlins), and Tobe Hooper (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre). But really, if you're interested in were-cats, see the original The Cat People, starring Simone Simon; it's both sexier and scarier. --Bret Fetzer

Customer Reviews:

This has that Stephen King feel.......2007-01-16

Stephen king says what is really scary is when you are just in the realm of reality and possibility. Then the spooky extraordinary seems scarier because this may be taking place next door.

This is a pretty good adoption from print to the screen. Of course the disadvantage is selecting what to show. The big advantage is not having to use the King potty mouth on every sentence. A few descriptive words are needed for the ambiance but King goes overboard in his writing.

Alice Krige the Borg queen and ghost is the perfect person to play Mary Brady as she can be so sweet and forceful at the same time.

If you look close you will see Stephen King as the Cemetery Caretaker. He is a much better token than Alfred Hitchcock
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We all know that there is some truth to fantastic creatures reported through the ages. This is the story of a pair of the last of a bread of shape shifting creatures called Sleepwalkers. They are a very close nit mother and son. They must live on the life essence of good girls and at all costs must avoid cats as cats are the mortal enemy of Sleepwalkers. Watch as they barley escape with their lives and set-up house in a rural community.

This is Barely a Horror Movie, but it is VERY Entertaining.......2006-08-11

Sleepwalkers has all the elements of a horror movie, and yet it isn't one. The first scene is very effective, and sets the tone for a good horror movie. We see Mark Hamill (unrecognizable from his Luke Skywalker days) as a cop checking out some odd goings-on at a house. But I wonder - did the girl scream or was she already dead? Or was it a dead body that screamed? The music and imagery during the opening credits is great. There's a definition of a sleepwalker from an old occult encyclopedia. The ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics and art look really cool. The sketch of a sleepwalker breastfeeding an infant looks scary. The thought that the infant might actually be a human being makes the sketch even more unsettling. Anyway, that first scene and the opening credits create an atmosphere of dread that we would expect to last throughout the rest of the movie. But Stephen King (who wrote the script) and director Mick Garris wanted to make a movie that was campy AND scary at the same time. Unfortunately, they failed to deliver with regard to the scares, but they do provide us with some good laughs. Sleepwalkers is a good movie, it's just not as good as it was meant to be. It's almost impossible for a movie to be both campy and scary, but I regard House of 1000 Corpses as a rare exception.

I think of Sleepwalkers as more of a comedy than a horror movie, just because there are so few moments that anyone would find scary (even though this movie terrified me when I was a kid). There's a lot of moments when this movie tries to be scary, but falls short, because the suspense is undermined by jokes or humorous incidents. All the murders are amusing for one reason or another. How can a murder be amusing? Watch this movie and you'll see what I mean - a lot of the murders look really silly, like when a Sheriff is bodyslammed on a picket fence. I think this movie works best as a comedy anyway. If the guys that made Sleepwalkers cut out all the funny stuff and just tried to go for the chills, then I think I would have enjoyed this movie a lot less.

In a nutshell, a mother and son are demonic shapeshifters called sleepwalkers that feed off the life-force of virgin women. Normally they take the form of human beings, so that they can go about daily life unnoticed. The incestuous behaviour of Mary Brady (Alice Krige) and her son Charles (Brian Krause) is disturbing, but for some reason it doesn't have any shock effect at all once it becomes apparent they aren't human. I suppose it's because I expect non-humans to do things that humankind considers perverse. But I also liked the way this movie made a nice instrumental like Santo and Johnny's `Sleepwalk' sound evil and creepy. Enya's `Boadicea' makes for good background music in the opening scene, but not when it shows Charles leaving the theatre - it just doesn't seem to suit the light-hearted nature of that scene. But when it plays at the end of the movie it suits that scene perfectly, and it runs on through the end credits.

I also like how the heroine Tanya Robertson (Madchen Amick) is a klutz, socially awkward, a nerd, and can resort to extreme acts of violence to defend herself. And I like how the teachers use corporal punishment on the kids, like rapping their knuckles with plastic rulers, or dragging them by the ear to the principal's office. The entertaining teacher Mr. Fallows (Glenn Shadix) has a few hilarious exchanges with Charles. Even Mr. Fallows' fatal run-in with Charles is somewhat of a light-hearted moment, thanks to Charles' wit. And the high-speed chase with the stressed out patrolman Andy Simpson (the excellent Dan Martin) is hilarious. I've seen Dan Martin in all kinds of stuff, so why is he still not getting the recognition he deserves?

The scene where Andy gets out of his car and stands in the middle of the deserted highway was good, but it would have been more effective if the viewer didn't know that Charles' car was invisible until AFTER Andy drove away. And that scene would have been more effective if he didn't curse (and say some really goofy words) out loud. A rather chilling scene was when Mrs. Brady puts the rose in Tanya's hair and says "There. It finishes you somehow." The coolest scene of the movie is when it shows Mrs. Brady lying on the ground, completely engulfed in flames. The most disturbing scene is when Tanya's arm gets cut on the broken glass of a police car window. And it was pretty cool when Mrs. Brady blows up the police cars, even if there was no realistic way they could have blown up like that.

I like cats, but all the cats in this movie are annoying. The scene of the cats running down the street to the Brady house is completely preposterous. But if there were no cats in this movie then there would be a problem, because a cat's scratch is the only thing that can harm a sleepwalker. I'm not sure if sleepwalkers are an actual legend or if Mr. King dreamed them up himself. If he did, why would he make a cat's scratch the only thing that can kill a sleepwalker? Something a little less complicated would have been better.

The guys that made this movie deserve a round of applause - it's hard as hell to make a movie that's funny AND scary, but in the case of Sleepwalkers they weren't just trying to be funny - they were trying to be HILARIOUS. Can a movie that's hilarious be scary? Some (but certainly not all) movies work because they don't take themselves seriously, like Sleepaway Camp 2. But in the case of Sleepwalkers it tries so hard to be funny that it can't be scary.

Unless you are a fan of Stephen King's work, you can ignore this one.......2006-07-24

I love watching movie adaptations of Stephen King's work. When I came across "Sleepwalkers", I thought it would be interesting. However, I was a little skeptic because I hadn't ever heard of it, but then realized that King directly made this into a movie without making it a book first. After watching the entire movie, I can clearly say that unless you are a die-hard King fan, you can avoid this movie at all costs.

The story is about the Brady family consisting of Charles (acted by Brian Krause, who nowadays is famous for his role as 'Leo' in the hit TV show "Charmed") and his mother Mary (played by Alice Krige), who move to Travis, Indiana. However, we know from the beginning that they are not who they say they are; in fact, they aren't even human beings. They are the Sleepwalkers - shape shifting creatures who feast on female virgins to keep themselves alive. Their only flaw is that they are vulnerable to cats. Anyway, Charles has his eyes on his next victim, who happens to be a high school cheerleader called Tanya (played by Mädchen Amick) and enrolls in the same class as her to seduce her. Will the Sleepwalkers be stopped in time or is it the end for Tanya?

I really wanted to enjoy this movie, but there are SO many holes in the storyline, which makes me confused to enjoy it, such as:

1) In the first scene of the movie, we see a bunch of dead cats hanging around the house, which proves that the Sleepwalkers can fight it and kill it. If that's the case, why were Charles and his mother afraid to even go outside their house to fight the cats off, instead of putting lame traps around them? We know they are not like vampires, and can walk during daylight.
2) When Tanya comes over to see Charles in his home, Charles realizes that the mirror reflects their true appearance, and pushes them to another room. So he knows he should avoid mirrors and other things, but yet in the graveyard, he lets Tanya take pictures of him? What's that all about? Okay, once or twice is fine, but he doesn't even stop her!
3) Thirdly, as Michael R Gates mentioned in his review, what is the point of the incest scenes between Charles and his mother? It doesn't progress the story in any way at all. It's not like they are mating to reproduce another of their kind (which would have made more sense).

There are many more questions, but I don't want to bore you with the details. The point is this movie was too confusing and silly to even enjoy it. The plus point is, the cast acted well, and we get to see King himself make an appearance, along with other horror creators Clive Barker and Tobe Hooper. Unfortunately, even with the cast, the story doesn't get any better. In fact, I felt sorry for the Sleepwalkers, because they are alone and they just need to keep themselves alive.

All in all, you can watch this movie if you have a lot of free time on your hands, but don't rent it in hopes of getting scared, or seeing something interesting, unless you are a fan of one of the cast members.

fun.......2006-05-26

First mick garris king collaboration.

Dont expect something too deep, save that for the later Garris films. This one is superficial fun. Gory, nicley paced- some truly wonderful camera movements

(absolute favourite- when Charles and Tanya roll across the ground and the camera rolls with them; at first its a parody of the romantic cliche, but the camera keeps on moving, and suddenly its dangerous- then the shot ends, and the entire scene is different; really well done).

Its directed with flair and energy. Some choice cameos. Dont expect The Shining, the tone is very different. have fun.

A Snoozer, Not a Sleeper.......2006-03-28

Arguably one of the worst flicks to which the name of horror master Stephen King is connected, 1992's SLEEPWALKERS was touted as the "first King story written expressly for the screen." Unfortunately, King must have written the story when he himself was sleepwalking, 'cause the flick's a genuine snooze-fest.

The story is set in a small midwestern town, where Mrs. Brady (Alice Krige) and her son, Charles (Brian Krause), have settled. But though they share the surname of that venerable family of classic TV, the resemblance ends there, as the members of THIS Brady family are long-lived shape-shifting monsters called Sleepwalkers--why they are known by this particular moniker is never really clear--sort of half-human, half-feline demons who feed off the life force of female virgins.

Although they have successfully assimilated themselves into the lifestyle of their small town, the Sleepwalker's cover is soon blown when Charles obsesses on having classmate Tanya (Madchen Amick) for his next victim. But it's not the town Sheriff nor seasoned monster-hunters who save Tanya and the rest of the town from the seemingly all-powerful Sleepwalkers. No, it's Tanya's cat, Klovis, and his feline friends who save the day. Turns out that Sleepwalkers and domestic house cats have been mortal enemies for centuries, and our feline friends are the only thing that have any sort of power over the deadly demons.

For the most part, the plot of SLEEPWALKERS is nonsensical, and though the audience is given some flimsy clues here and there, having Klovis the cat turn out to be the Van Helsing of the Sleepwalker universe comes across as a Deus ex Machina of the corniest kind. Even worse, the script's dialogue is mostly ludicrous, and the incestuous relationship between Mrs. Brady and son seems unnecessary and extraneous to the overall story (what little there is of a story). Definitely not King's best effort.

Still, SLEEPWALKERS is not without a few minor virtues. There are cameo appearances by King and his horror-maven friends John Landis, Joe Dante, Clive Barker, and Tobe Hooper. Genre fans will also get a kick out of the inside-joke casting of actor Ron Perlman as police captain Soames. (For the uninitiated, Perlman rose to fame portraying the titular feline-like beast in the 1980s TV series BEAUTY AND THE BEAST.) Also, the film's theme song, a creepy but catchy little ditty called "Sleepwalk," is really cool and has become a staple on a myriad of Halloween- and horror-themed web sites. Alas, these virtues just aren't enough to raise the quality of the overall flick.

Though the DVD from Columbia-Tristar does feature the film in both anamorphic widescreen and pan-and-scan, the disc is a no-frills offering that has nothing to entice horror fans to add the film to their collections (an interview with King would've been nice). No wonder SLEEPWALKERS often ends up in the bargain bins at discount stores.

In short, SLEEPWALKERS is a rather lame horror flick. As Stephen King's first direct-to-screen offering, it might be of minor interest to fans of the horror maven, but most other viewers will want to steer clear of this clunker.

Average customer rating:

Horror?...but, in a "funny" way
Giant Killer Eye on DVD
Eye From The Eighth Dimension
Boring!
Oh, Where to Begin...

The Killer Eye
Starring: Jacqueline Lovell , Jonathan Norman , Nanette Bianchi , Costas Koromilas , and Blake Bailey
Director: David DeCoteau
Manufacturer: FULL MOON
ProductGroup: DVD
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Similar Items:

Talisman
Shrieker
Hideous!
Creepozoids
Head of the Family

ASIN: B0000B1OCT
Release Date: 2003-12-09

Customer Reviews:

Horror?...but, in a "funny" way.......2007-04-28

This film is really out there. It has some pretty good effects which i wasn't really looking forward too, so, that surprised me for a low budget film. The acting is wellll...lets just say it has its moments..lol. But, the film has some great funny parts thats for sure. If your into comedy/horror than this film is a great pick up for you other than that, its a rental for sure.

Giant Killer Eye on DVD.......2004-03-23

This is not to be confused with Roger Corman's tribute to B-films, that's The Phantom Eye. Also don't confuse it with Forrest Tucker's alien invasion movie, that's The Crawling Eye. Nope, this one is a collection of bad actors, sets that don't fit together, a script which confuses the sets, and a giant eyeball on a stalk that has a thing for women.

A goofy scientist is trying to view the eighth dimension. His test subject is accidentally infected by something from said dimension. It swells into the giant eye. The eye swarms around an apartment building by using the air vents. Huh? The vents are about four feet by three feet.

The scientist has a wife who tries to bed every male in the film (except Weird Bill) as she wants it all the time. Two male bodybuilders who do heavy drugs and hang out in their underwear are one of her targets. They are also a target for the Eye.

Anyway, the Eye runs around the building feeling up women and blasting people with green rays. Luckily it is sensitive to light. In the end it is cornered (don't know why it couldn't get away) and flees back to its home dimension.

Really bad film. The bodybuilders apartment is a two-story studio with the door on a landing in the top half. The script occasionally calls the lab the attic and the attic the lab. To make it worse, the bodybuilders place has a peaked ceiling with beams (shouldn't that one be at the top?).

So we have a film with a bad script, bad acting (I love Weird Bills fake voice), lots of nudity, strange characters, and a monster eye. It's so bad, what's not to like?

The DVD has no special features except a small group of trailers for other films. There is not even a scene selection option. At least it does have tracks.

Eye From The Eighth Dimension.......2004-03-23

So we have a film with a bad script, bad acting (I love Weird Bills fake voice), lots of nudity, strange characters, and a monster eye. It's so bad, what's not to like?

Boring!.......2004-03-03

Now I like this kind of movie.....usually.

The reviewer below covers most of it & the two other movies he mentioned - 'Hideous' & 'Head of the Family' - I do like, but unfortunately this one just doesn't have anything going for it.

A giant eye going around, for want of a better phrase, having sex with people does sound like it could be funny....but it isn't. I hate to give a Full Moon movie only two stars beause I'm definitely a fan, but to be honest, this barely deserves one! Come on people, get a grip, this isn't even a good bad movie!

Oh, Where to Begin..........2004-02-15

On the bright side, Jacqueline Lovell looks very good and let's face it, that is the best thing about this truly bad movie. We have "Creepy Bill" doing a really odd impression of Michael Keaton's Beetlejuice throughout this flick (Why? No one knows.), two stoners with great bodies and no acting ability - wait...did I actually use the words "acting ability" within the confines of a review for THIS MOVIE? No, no, no - Lovell is the closest thing to an actor you will find in this thing. As for everyone else...pu-lease. Lovells husband, who married her for her money (With that body? The man is truly a mad scientist!) is conducting experiments into another dimension and brings back through this tiny eyepiece INTO a street kids eyeball, which then emerges out into an enormous killer eye. Kind'a raises the hair on the back of your neck, huh?

And shall we touch upon the amazing special effects? Let us do more than touch. Let us beat them senseless with a baseball bat. Much like the plot they are awful and practically nonexistent.

Would I recommend this movie? Oh yes. While a truly bad movie, it certainly isn't in the same catagory as BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS (truly the WORST movie ever made), but then what is? It will go on my shelf with PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE. For the lovers of insanely mind numbing and fun films, and I'll admit to being one, it is well worth owning.

Average customer rating:

Great comedy.
Sex Monster
It's alive!! It's alive!!!
I thought this movie was hilarious
low quality exloitatio nfilm

The Sex Monster
Starring: Stephen Baldwin , Anita Barone , Missy Crider , Robin Curtis , and Melissa Denton
Manufacturer: Lions Gate
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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French Twist
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Girl Play
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Loving Annabelle

ASIN: B00004LMDJ
Release Date: 2000-01-25

Customer Reviews:

Great comedy........2006-01-10

This is one of the best comedies I have ever seen.

Sex Monster.......2005-08-05

When a friend described the premise of this movie - a reluctant wife enters a ménage à trois upon her husband's urging and likes it so much that she becomes a 'sex monster' - my curiosity was piqued. I wasn't disappointed. The movie could have lapsed into the prurient but didn't; instead, the characters were evenly developed and the plot grew. It was frequently amusing, and occasionally laugh-out-loud funny. Not a bad 'date movie'...it would probably spark some conversation! >:)

It's alive!! It's alive!!!.......2004-12-05

Mike Binder directs and stars in this amusing comedy about a ordinary married man who wants to experience new things with his wife, Mariel Hemingway (Tv's L.A. Law, Bad Moon), in the sex categorie. So the 2 have a threesome (menagetrois) and soon after Binder's wife cant get enough of it and he finds out he has created a sex monster. The cast is great, especially Hemingway in a role she hasnt played before. Binder is so enjoyable you forget the stupid stuff and your just watching him bumble away which gives the movie its energy juice. Stephen Baldwin (The Usual Suspects, Spiders Web) has a supporting role as one of Binder's friends and Melissa Crider (A Boy Called Hate, Frailty) also stars as one of Hemingway's sexual partners. A guilty pleasure in some aspects. The highlights would have to be when Binder, his wife and the 3rd company are having she, so he leaves the room when he cant take the sex no more.

I thought this movie was hilarious.......2004-06-27

I ended up seeing this film, on one of the movie channels on my cable. I usually don't like soft-core pornography, but this movie is more about the laughs than it is about the sex.

I think it's funny how the husband is so estatic that he has a lesbian for a wife, until he's out of the picture.

I really just thought this film was hilarious, and because it doesn't focus only on the sexual aspect I'm going to reccomend it to alot of my friends.

low quality exloitatio nfilm.......2004-05-21

Sick film, alwful and pointless. No plot, not funny, emberessing.

Average customer rating:

I should have read the other reviews here first......
AMUSING PIECE OF TRASH
Boring!
Movie Review
Horror fans beware...

Entrails of a Virgin
Starring: Saeko Kizuki , Naomi Hagio , Megumi Kawashima , Osamu Tsuruoka , and Daiki Katô
Director: Kazuo 'Gaira' Komizu
Manufacturer: Synapse Video
ProductGroup: DVD
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Entrails of a Beautiful Woman
Thriller - A Cruel Picture
Night Train Murders
I Spit On Your Grave (Millennium Edition)
SS Hell Camp

ASIN: B0002CX15M
Release Date: 2004-07-27

Description

A group of people on a photo shoot in the woods take refuge in a dark house as a dense fog rolls in. When night falls, a mud-covered creature from the nearby swamp stalks them one by one brutally killing them and performing horrific sex-games with the women. ENTRAILS OF THE VIRGIN is the controversial sex-and-gore nightmare from director Gaira (Kazuo Komizu). Presented here for the first time with a brand new, digitally mastered anamorphic widescreen transfer from original vault materials, ENTRAILS OF THE VIRGIN is definitely not for the squeamish! Prepare to be shocked, offended, horrified and repulsed by every single frame of this unbelievable Japanese cult classic. Remember, you've been warned!

SPECIAL FEATURES:
- New Anamorphic (1.78:1) Widescreen Transfer
- Original Uncut Japanese Language Version
- Newly Translated Easy-to-Read Removable Subtitles
- Animated DVD Menus
- Original Theatrical Trailer
- Video Interview with Director Gaira
- Essay on the Japanese Film Fogging Controversy STARRING Saeko Kizuki Naomi Hagio Kazuhiko Goda Taiju Kato WRITTEN BY Gaira (Kazuo Komizu) PRODUCED BY Hiroshi Hanzawa and Toshio Sato DIRECTED BY Gaira (Kazuo Komizu)
Not Rated 1986 Approx 73 min. Color NTSC Dolby Digital Mono 1.78:1
ADULTS ONLY! CONTAINS SCENES OF EXPLICIT SEX AND GRAPHIC VIOLENCE

Customer Reviews:

I should have read the other reviews here first.............2006-03-11

Hello all you perverted freaks out there! Capt. Freaky is back! With a new vintage Japanese film review for you...So lets cut right to the chase!

DON'T WASTE A DIME ON THIS CRAPPY MOIVE! PERIOD!!!!!! I GIVE IT ZERO STARS...NOT ONE SCENE WAS "STAR" WORTHY!

I should have read the other reviews about this film here at Amazon...then I could have saved my money for something else out there that may actually be interesting. The girls in this crappy film are mostly flat chested and unactractive...by Japanese law...the film makers have to always blurr out any genital hair or actual genitals from every scene (what does that tell you?)...the sex is poorly acted...

But by far the worst part of this entire film was the "over dubbed", phony sexual moaning! It was so phony and annoying; as if about a 10 yr old girl was having her toe nails pulled right out of her feet!...I think the only horror of this movie was having to listen to all that fake moaning, dubbed over the real actresses... all while looking at these flat girls poorly simulating sex!

And as for "the monster"?...He is nothing more than a bad Japanese actor who looks like he just stepped out of a "mud bath" at a spa in Sonoma CA! And it was so obvious that he is wearing a huge "dildo" over his (probably very small) "privates" while he proceeds to have sex with two different flat girls...then he shoots out, what appears to be a quart of "baby oil" all over them, (to simulate his ejaculate)

Do any of these comic scenarios I have detailed here sound like a film that you "real freaky" fans of mine want to see?
I don't know what else to say here that hasn't already been said in the previous reviews...this film sucks big time. There are no redeeming (rape, realistic torture, good frontal nudity, hot eroticism) values for you freaks to see here. There are also no interesting actresses to watch getting screwed...etc. I kept feeling like I was the one being screwed while watching this!

The bottom line is...the French and Italian film makers of the 1970's have cornered the market on this genre of films. The American's don't even bother making this genre at all....our producers go straight for the XXX pornos! L.A. is full of video tape porno houses filming young beautiful talent getting pounded FOR REAL every week....and if I can't locate any other classic old erotica films that were made back in the '70's soon....I won't have any other choice but to resort to checking out porn! (its often made so tacky these days however!)

Its unfortunate that Synopsis Films released this comic loser....it was a huge waste of my time and money...but after reading this review...it should not be a waste of YOURS!

AMUSING PIECE OF TRASH.......2005-11-13

This movie is pure Japanise exploitation-trash-schlock. Balancing on the edge of soft-porn it has about its 2/3 given away for sex scenes. And rather explicit ones. What's the most funny - in those scenes all possible images of genitalia are hazed with special misty spots. But in the booklet there's a history of censorship in Japan concerning nudity on screen from the very beginning of cinema in this country. So I'd advise you to read it first, then everything becomes much more clearer.
Well, apart from sex there are brutal killings, some mud-covered monster with distorted voice, stupid dialogs and some kind of a plot which apparently serves as an excuse for all this mess. I was watching "Entrails of a Virgin" with my eyes wide open because I didn't ever know such trash even exists. That's why I gave it the second star - at times this movie surprises and amuzes.
Here's a fluent retelling of one scene, so you could get an idea: one of the female characters gets extremely horny, so she finds a severed arm of another character been killed, and starts masturbating with this hand. A monster with his giant phallus appeares. Hereafter she performs a fellatio on him while still masturbating with the hand (the severed one). Then she copulates with the monster crying she can't bear this anymore - it's so good and exciting, she's gonna die. Though she doesn't die. When the intercourse is finished, the monster penetrates her vagina with his hand and tears her intestines out.
Well, that's one of the brightest scenes in the movie. If you like that kind of cinema - don't hesitate and buy it although I must warn you the other scenes are not that spectacular.

Boring!.......2005-10-27

I'm a big fan of Japanese horror films--the cognoscenti are starting to refer to it as "J-horror"--so I just knew I had to check out "Entrails of the Virgin" and "Entrails of the Beautiful Woman" when the friendly folks over at Synapse Films released them to DVD. These two films, made all the way back in the 1980s by some chap named Kazuo Komizu, have a reputation most hardcore horror film producers would give their right arms to possess. I heard and read the most enthusiastic comments regarding these two movies, about the insane levels of gory mayhem coupled with sex of the variety not often seen outside an adult film theater. You certainly don't see those two themes put side by side in movies made in the United States, at least not anymore. No one over here would dare make a film like these atrocities. First of all, such a film would never pass the ratings board, let alone secure a spot in the theaters. Too, the watchdog groups would drop on the filmmakers' heads like a ton of bricks. Then there is NOW and the other feminist groups to contend with. Those bonecrushers would grind any filmmaker into powder over a movie that looked like Komizu's movies.

"Entrails of the Virgin," the first in the series, starts out by introducing us to a bunch of photographers and models out on a photo shoot somewhere in Japan. Nothing much happens as the film treats us to seemingly endless--and immensely boring--scenes of these slightly unattractive girls striking cheesecake poses. Then they all hop in a van and strike off down the road. A fog moves in, or the dry ice machine starts up, and the vehicle hits a creature in the road. Nobody finds anything, however, so they get back in and drive to a little shack out in the woods. By this time I'm looking at the DVD case to make sure I'm watching the right movie. Meanwhile, the movie grinds on. Lots of talky scenes between the girls and the photographers reveal several things. One, the guys are total sleaze balls who think nothing of luring girls out on a photo shoot in order to take advantage of them. Two, these girls are dumber than a bag of hammers. Three, wrestling with a girl isn't nearly as interesting as it sounds, or at least doesn't play onscreen as well as it sounds. At this point, I'm thinking about calling NOW to complain.

So we watch, eagerly awaiting the carnage that MUST certainly arrive soon, as these people drink themselves into a stupor and then engage in uninspiring carnal activities. Then finally, something starts to happen. Remember that creature I said they hit in the van out on the road? Well, it shows up to wreak some serious havoc on our little group. Now we're going to see some real gore! Yippee! Nope, not really. Oh, the beastie rips a few people apart, and commits some invasive violence in spots, but the effects are so cheesy that my enthusiasm rapidly dwindled. At one point, one of these people runs around a tennis court outside while someone (I assume the beastie) chucks dinner plates at them! What's up with that? Who knows? I sure as heck don't. What I do know is that the movie roars to a conclusion with a few things that will stick in your noggin. Like the girl using a human arm to...well, let's just say she's keeping herself busy. Then there's the beast itself, a mud coated creature with a very noticeable feature that he puts to good use with the ladies. Yeah, that. By the time the television screen faded to black, I headed for the shower.

I hope I'm not making "Entrails of the Virgin" sound better than it is. Komizu's film is an exercise in extreme boredom. Endless sex scenes with the requisite fogging of certain body parts, a form of censorship all too common in Japan because of certain culture inhibitions, severely curtails any thrill a viewer on these shores would get out of the movie's numerous acrobatics. Not that any normal person would look at this movie as an exercise in erotic cinema. I certainly didn't. As for the gore, it's not anything you couldn't see in an Italian zombie flick or a current Japanese horror flick. It is over the top and occasionally taboo breaking, but the effects are so poorly carried off as to ruin the whole exercise. The most egregious sin committed in the movie is the lack of a plot. Now I'm a forgiving sort who doesn't mind a little surrealism or esotericism thrown into a movie, but I need something to hang my hat on, something to give me a little bit of a place on which to stand so I can try to figure out what's going on. We don't get that here. Character development is nonexistent, things happen for no apparent reason, and the monster is largely an enigma.

Maybe I'm trying too hard. Anyway, Synapse sure put a lot of work into the disc. The picture quality looks great, oddly enough. Extras include an essay explaining the omnipresent optical fogging, a trailer for the movie, and an interview with none other than Kazuo Komizu himself. If you're hoping for explanatory information on the film from the director, think again. This guy is a first class oddball who spends more time talking about the shape of the earth and giggling over the weird electronic noises emanating from his computer than throwing the viewer a rope. I'm not going to recommend the film to anyone--if you're into horror, you know whether you want to see this one or not. Good luck if you attempt the journey.

Movie Review.......2005-07-07

The Movie is a Japanese produced, Grade D, low budget piece of trash. Some nudity, and violence, but most of it was off camera. Don't waste your time.

Horror fans beware..........2005-02-12

The plot, what little there is of it: Three Japanese pornographers go out into the mountains to shoot photos. Due to the fog, they stop their van and decide to spend the night in an abandoned building, where they get drunk and sexually assault the photo shoot girls. Little do they know, there is a "swamp monster" lurking with similar sexual designs and murderous intentions as well.

As a horror fan, I was disappointed. There are no scares, the direction is sloppy, and the gore is minimal with maybe two exceptions. In three cases when a violent attack occurs, the camera cuts away to a "metaphorical" shot representing the violence, for example, a hammer hitting a piece of meat. I found the whole exercise pretty tedious to sit through for a pretty half-assed payoff at the end. Specifically in the last gore scene, latex that's supposed to be human skin stretches and bends with bubble-gum elasticity. Very fake.

Then you have the swamp monster, well, not really a monster, he's actually some Japanese guy caked in mud. When they finally show a good shot of him, he's got his hair spiked up in a muddy mohawk! Pretty laughable, and to call it a real horror film would be stretching the truth somewhat. If you take out the sex, you could probably edit this 72 minute feature down to a 15 minute short. However, I would even imagine most sex film fans would be disappointed with the digitally blurred genitalia that tames it down to softcore level.

Nothing is ever explained, really. It's all a rather incoherent mishmash of sex-rape scenes with the horror aspects emerging in the last 20 minutes or so. But by that time it was too late to generate any real interest. The confusion is somewhat explained by watching the interview with director Komizu. His nonsensical ramblings while chainsmoking gave me the impression of a week-long crystal meth binge. At least he seems like he had fun filming the movie.

I would only recommend this movie to diehard fans of Japanese sex films, or perhaps the heavily drugged. I generously gave it two stars, only because of the beautiful Japanese girls, and the two brief gore parts that actually worked, one involving the use of a severed arm (!) If you're looking for disturbing Japanese horror, try Organ, Evil Dead Trap, or something from the Guinea Pig series before resorting to Entrails of a Virgin!

Average customer rating:

almost worth it for fiona lewis
Another Cardona crudfest
Worst film ever?
An epic length softcore porn movie with a killer shark...
Something Appart from a Rip Off

Tintorera
Starring: Susan George , Hugo Stiglitz , Andrés García , Fiona Lewis , and Eleazar García
Director: René Cardona Jr.
Manufacturer: Desert Mountain
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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The House Where Evil Dwells
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Under Lock and Key

ASIN: B000255LMU
Release Date: 2004-09-21

Description

Two Mexican tourists, Steven and Miguel, on holiday at a tropical island resort, flirt with various ladies from England and hunt sharks. The partying soon becomes disrupted by a large and monstrous tiger shark who begins attacking and devouring tourists. Steven and Miguel decide to take it upon themselves to hunt down and kill the beast.

Customer Reviews:

almost worth it for fiona lewis.......2006-03-09

this is not a very good movie but when i saw fiona lewis walking nude on the beach i about dropped my popcorn. 2 stars just for that. it loses two stars for killing her off so soon.

Another Cardona crudfest.......2005-07-12

It looks like we're finally seeing the works of famed Mexican director Rene Cardona, Jr. arrive on DVD. Such an event gives horror/exploitation fans the world over reason to cheer--or let out a huge raspberry as a show of defiance. Cardona burst on the scene back in 1964 with the smash hit "El Raspado" before moving on to a career in rancid, cheese infested exploitation fare like "The Night of a Thousand Cats," "Cyclone," "The Bermuda Triangle," and "Guyana: Crime of the Century." Cardona had a knack for assembling recognizable talent from the United States and Europe, putting them in truly dreadful pictures, and then sitting back and waiting for the pesos to roll in. I suspect he saw precious few pesos if the two movies I've seen are any indication. After sitting through the tasteless account of the Jim Jones massacre followed closely followed up with the two-hour plus cerebral novocaine that is "Tintorera," I'm thinking about heading down to Old Mexico for a refund. But, alas, such will not happen. Director Cardona passed away in 2003. One hopes that he spends his time in purgatory watching his films on a perpetual loop, preferably while suffering a chronic case of Montezuma's Revenge.

I thought "Guyana: Crime of the Century" was bad! I hadn't seen anything yet until I sat through the toxic sludge of "Tintorera: Tiger Shark." A shameless (yet shameful) attempt to cash in on the success of "Jaws," Cardona's "Tintorera" contains nothing of interest for the hardcore exploitation fan. Instead of huge numbers of gory shark killings, we get instead a lame story about a rich jerk's various romantic entanglements during his stay in a boat anchored off the coast of Mexico. Miguel (Andres Garcia) is looking to let loose with the ladies, and he's quite successful considering he owns a huge yacht that floats just offshore in full view of the numerous lovely ladies parading about on the beach. His first conquest is a disenchanted brunette, Patricia (Fiona Lewis), who eventually rejects him for a local Lothario named Esteban (Hugo Stiglitz). The two men fight over Patricia briefly, but when she disappears one morning thanks to a huge tiger shark, Miguel and Esteban put aside their differences and decide to go hunting for ladies together. Why not? Esteban has the smooth talk and good looks down to a T, and the brooding Miguel has the money to finance their escapades as well as the fancy yacht.

Miguel and Esteban become quite close, close enough to embark on an adventurous liaison with the beautiful Gabriella (Susan George!). When the two men aren't mixing things up with their new girlfriend, they're out mucking around on the bottom of the ocean hunting sharks. We know exactly what they're doing because Cardona shows us their expeditions in brain deadening detail. They use a spear gun to spike a fish and then wait for the blood in the water to draw in the sharks. Then one of the men, usually Esteban, shoots the shark with an underwater gun. Fun stuff! Obviously, these two idiots are environmentally aware hunters who respect wildlife in all its myriad forms. Anyway, after watching these trite scenes for what feels like forever, something tragic happens to Esteban. Gabriella, who cannot deal with losing one side of this love triangle, bails out on the stricken Miguel. Vowing revenge against the animal that ruined his relationship with both Gabriella and Esteban, Miguel goes on a campaign to hunt down the guilty tiger shark. Of course, tragedy strikes once again when a young lady falls prey to the hungry beastie in full view of Miguel. Our rich hero eventually tracks down the shark, much to his and the fish's lasting detriment.

Egads, this movie stinks! "Tintorera" has to rank as one of the most ridiculous "animals run amok" films I've ever seen. We hardly ever see the shark in action because Cardona is far more interested in spending his two plus hour runtime showing us underwater footage and interminable stretches of dialogue heavy scenes that numb the mind with their banality. I'm appalled to consider for a second that actress Susan George agreed to appear in this car wreck, but there she is mugging for the camera every chance she gets. Too, I noticed Priscilla Barnes of "Three's Company" fame slumming for a paycheck in a small role near the end of the film. But it's the two actors in the lead roles of Miguel and Esteban who are most deserving of my scorn. Hugo Stiglitz, a Cardona regular whose eyebrows meet in the middle of his head, is greatly annoying in his part. Most shocking was the sudden realization that he looks like a Mexican James Caan. As for the actor playing Miguel, what's up with his face? He has a smile that would warm a sociopath's heart, and his eyes could scare small children. And he's supposed to be a winner of women's hearts? Yeah, right. Crispin Glover would have a better chance landing the babes than this freaky looking dude.

The biggest flaw with "Tintorera" isn't the bad acting or the pathetic dialogue; it's simply the fact that NOTHING EVER HAPPENS! The shark kills are far too few in number and largely consist of red dye floating around in the water. I don't know about you, but when I pop in an exploitation film I expect to see some serious exploitation. Thinking about it, perhaps this is an exploitation film after all in that I'm the one who was exploited because I spent nearly two and a half hours waiting for something to happen. What a fool I am. I can't recommend "Tintorera" to anyone; it's boring, relatively bloodless, and fails miserably in every aspect of its execution.

Worst film ever?.......2005-02-02

I'm a huge fan of shark films but Tintorera:Tiger Shark is the worst shark movie of them all and quite possibly the worst film ever made. I expected it to be somewhat B Grade but what I didn't expect was half a dozen or so real live sharks killed for the camera. More sharks were killed than human characters. It was quite disturbing to see these poor creatures being shot with a spear gun for some kind of weird cinematic purpose. The film maker should be ashamed of himself.

To call this is a shark movie is kind of a joke because there were only 3 attack scenes and very sub standard attacks I might add. In addition to the paper thin plot, there was a bizarre sub plot which involved a creepy three-some between two fisherman (shark hunters) and a blonde woman. (Susan George). I really had trouble following what the hell was going on here as this sub plot took centre stage to the main plot. All I can say is "Mondo Bizarro Dude!"

I'm kind of annoyed I wasted my money on this tripe. Even the DVD cover couldn't get it right. It has a photo of large Great White instead of a Tiger Shark. What the?...

I could go on about this piece of crap but I won't. If you are thinking about buying Tintorera:Tiger Shark.....Don't!

An epic length softcore porn movie with a killer shark..........2004-10-03

Jaws (1975) is one of my favorite films, and not just because of the fantastic and terrifying effects involving the shark, but because it's one of the most well crafted movies ever produced...the acting, the plot, script, direction, musical score, casting, the character development, attention to detail...everything came together so well...too well, as it turns out because soon afterwards, nearly everyone was churning out lame films featuring any kind of beastie you could imagine in an attempt to try and feed off the success of Spielberg's popular film, incorporating very little, if anything, that made Jaws so good, including this Mexican production entitled Tintorera (1977) aka The Silent Death aka Bloody Waters aka Tiger Shark.

Directed by the prolific René Cardona Jr., whose specialty seems to be low budget schlocky Mexican films, the film features English actress Susan George (Straw Dogs), Hugo Stiglitz (Incubo sulla città contaminata aka City of the Walking Dead), Andrés García (The Bermuda Triangle), and Fiona Lewis, who some may remember as the evil Dr. Margaret Canker from the film Innerspace (1987). As the film begins, we are presented with two men in Steven (Stiglitz) and Miguel (Garcia). Steven, who first appears as a patient in a hospital, has had some sort of stress related breakdown from working too hard, and is ordered by his doctor to take a long vacation. He ends up renting a boat off the pacific coast, near a popular Mexican resort, one where Miguel, who also appears to be on vacation, seems to be staying. Miguel is apparently a gigolo by profession, and seems to be continuing his ways at the resort, so I guess his is a working vacation. Anyway, both men end up sharing a relationship with Patricia (Lewis), but she soon gets gobbled up by a shark (in about two feet of water), and, since no one witnessed the attack, the men assume she left, and their once acrimonious relationship turns friendly, sharing the bond of both being stilted by the same woman. Miguel soon takes residence on Steven's large rented boat, and the men begin drinking, carousing with various women, and take up shark hunting. They also, in my opinion, begin developing a homoerotic relationship that's never actually shown, but certainly seemed implied. After awhile, the meet Gabriella (George), and the three develop a creepy ménage a trois...yuck...oh yeah, there's a few more shark attacks, but that's about it...

Now mind you, I wasn't expecting anything great here, but this is just a really terrible film. I will say there are some nicely shot underwater scenes, but that's about it...even those scenes will probably end up putting off some viewers, as many real sharks were harmed in the production of this film. They really seemed to have no problem in killing off all sorts of sea life in the progression of the story. I have no love of sharks, but seeing them senselessly slaughtered again and again kinda turned my stomach. And wait until you get to the part when they gut a defenseless sea turtle...yuck...I guess fake sharks were more expensive than real sharks. The direction is really bad, as the Cardona has no concept of transitioning from one scene to another. One minute you're watching a particular scene, and then POOF!, you're watching another, completely unrelated scene, and you're left trying to figure out what the heck is going on...after awhile, I did manage to put some of the pieces together, but ultimately the jarring effect only served to take me out of the film. There was absolutely no tension throughout, even when I knew a shark attack was imminent. The film has the look of a pornographic movie from the 70's, one where they took out the hardcore sex scenes and tried, unsuccessfully, to incorporate the element of the shark. The acting was on par of what you'd expect to see in a Mexican soap opera (I'm sure Mexicans put out some wonderful shows, but their soap operas are even more atrocious than those in the US), and the dialogue is even worse. The characters spew out the most inane lines, but this does provide some unintentional humor. There is a good amount of nudity, both of the male and female kind, but it was all gratuitous as it served no purpose other than to offer weak titillation to very bored viewers. The plot is incredibly lame, and plods along at a snails pace, as this particular version has an excruciatingly long run time of just over two hours (I do believe there are a few versions out there, with shorter running times, but lucky me, this seems to be the original, uncut version). And then there's the odd and less than appropriate, completely annoying musical score...disco music and killer sharks just do not mix.

Being the 25th Anniversary Edition, one might expect something special with this release. Well, you'll probably disappointed...the full screen print used here looks probably about as good as what you'd see on a used VHS copy. The picture has visible flaws throughout, most involving damage due to age and deterioration. It's not terrible, but certainly noticeable. The dialog is mostly in Spanish, with a lesser mix of English. There are English subtitles available, but when you have that feature turned on, you also get Spanish subtitles when the characters are speaking English. What is the point of that? I suppose if you are watching the film with a group of people, some only speaking English and some who only speak Spanish, it is useful, but if not, it just seems moronic. As far as special features, there are brief biographies and selected filmographies (no listing of this film in there, oddly enough) of the director and some of the talent, along with a few trailers for films I've never heard of, as I believe they're all low budget Mexican productions.

Cookieman108

Something Appart from a Rip Off.......2004-09-28

I had seen this movie many years ago before buying the DVD. It's not so much about a killer fish who's got something personal against the protagonist of this movie as it is about his sexual quest in Cancún, México. It's cheesy and I wont justify it given its bad reputation, but there's some elements that really set this one appart from the rest of the Rip Offs: The homosexual undertones between Andres García ans Hugo Stiglitz, the sex trianlge concept, the excellent underwater photography. The only thing that bothers me a bit about this movie is a lot of the partying, which makes you wonder at a certain point if the whole intention was just to get an excuse to party with this film, or to attract foreign tourists, and a couple of narrative inconsistencies ( He just went to the beach to realief himself from the stress of the city, and before you know he had been there for months, without giving at any point his two week notice). The lines between Hugo Stiglitz and Andres García are pretty cool. Susan George could've made a classic character if she wasn't so unenthusiastic as she seemed about this project. I noticed she was reluctant to strip bare, which could've added as well.

One thing about this version: Even though it seemingly runs pretty long compared to whatever versions were out there before, Its still missing a PRETTY CONSIDERABLE CHUNK of the ending. The ending was pretty similar to "NIGHTMARE CITY", another one in which Hugo Stiglitz was in. I was very dissapointed because of that.

Whoever put this movie out there in DVD, PLEASE PLEASE release some more of Cardona's titles: I would suggest HOSTAGES!, THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE, CYCLONE, THE TREASURE OF THE AMAZON and I'm very curious about a rape revenge flick that he made called LOS PLACERES OCULTOS.

Thanks!!!

Average customer rating:

Just because it is foreign doesn't mean it isn't trash
The best of Franco
Get this movie for Lena Lomay ONLY !!
BAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF!
Wow

Female Vampire
Starring: Gilda Arancio , Alice Arno , Luis Barboo , Jean-Pierre Bouyxou , and Roger Germanes
Manufacturer: Image Entertainment
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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Daughters of Darkness
Vampyres
Vampyros Lesbos
Images in a Convent
Erotic Nights of the Living Dead

ASIN: 6305943613
Release Date: 2000-08-08

Description

Countess Irina of Karlstein resides quietly in a hotel on the island of Madeira, where she sustains her immortality by feeding on the life essence of men and women. When new victims are found fatally drained of potency, forensic scientist Dr. Roberts consults his colleague, Dr. Orloff, who confirms that a vampire is responsible. Meanwhile, Irina is confronted by a poet who believes he is destined to become her lover and join her among the immortals! Jess Franco's influential erotic horror film is presented here in its full-strength version, and for the first time in a widescreen format. The uninhibited Lina Romay makes her starring debut as Countess Irina in a role that established her as a sex and horror film icon. Submit yourself to the life-consuming thirsts of EuroHorror's most famous Female Vampire!

Customer Reviews:

Just because it is foreign doesn't mean it isn't trash.......2007-06-18

OK ... I know a lot of folks are going to think I am just an uneducated and uncultured American, but this movie was HORRIBLE. I am a HUGE fan of 60s and 70s horror movies and vampire movies in particular and this was neither.

Our heroine(?) seemed to be able to transform herself into a bat and fed on the life force and sexual fluids of her victims (both male and female) but that is where the vampire theme ended. The last member of the Karnstein family, she believes herself to be cursed and cannot find love without killing her paramours. OK, now you know about as much of the plot as you are ever going to find out. No fangs, walking around in the daylight, no fear of religious symbols (which seemed to be mysteriously lacking), none of the traditional vampire traits other than a trail of bodies.

Basically this movie is soft-core porn. The french title translated roughly to "The Countess with bare breast" and our heroine is rarely seen wearing anything except a cape, belt and over-the-knee length boots. She has 1 other outfit to wear but no one seems to ever notice the fact she is allergic to fabric. And the shame of it is the love scenes are so horribly done, with the actress'es hair covering her lover's genitalia 90% of the time. 100% of the time would be an improvement because we could actually believe the love scene if it weren't for the times we see a flaccid penis hanging 3-4 inches below her bottom lip. Bad bad bad editing.

And the storyline? Well, it is not remotely horror. There is nothing scary about it! No frights, no suspense, no mystery, no plot twists, every action can be seen a mile away and by the time it happens you are bored waiting for it to happen. There seemed to be an investigator and a coroner investigating the murders, but do they ever meet our vampire? Well, the coroner sees her in her bathtub, but thats all.

I think I have finally found a movie worse than Satan's Cheerleaders. At least it was camp.

The best of Franco.......2007-05-04

Jess Franco is either the most incompetent director ever or the most avant garde. What to make of his often incomprehenisble edits, is confusion of time (one of his films takes place in the 19th century, but features a car), and his free use of the zoom? But this film is possibly his best, along with the the Awful Dr. Orloff, his first. Like many of Franco's works from this period, the film has a great soundtrack. Lina Romay is no Soledad Miranda, but she is okay as a fluid draining vampire who satiates herself on her lovers blood & sexual fluids. Although the zoom is present, it's not as annoying as in his other films. And this film isn't boring, a condition that afflcits many of his other films. Franco was actually an assistant to Orson Welles on his aborted Don Quixote project. Oh, to have been a fly on the wall to hear Welles talk to Franco!

Get this movie for Lena Lomay ONLY !!.......2005-04-02

For those of you who are fans of Lena Lomay (you might have seen her in another Jess Franco flick "Ilsa, the Wicked Warden"), then you'll want to get this one if you enjoy seeing her charms. (And by "charms" I don't mean acting talent. Her body does all the work for her.) First of all, this is not really a vampire flick. If you are looking for a good vampire movie, search elsewhere; but if you are looking to see a constantly naked and writhing Lena Lomay, then get this Euro-flick. She'll make you forget all about the plot of the movie. (Wait....this movie has no plot to begin with.) Anyway, there are some really good shots of her in this film (some with legs in the "eagle" fashion), and throughout the entire movie, she behaves like a nympho on steroids--she just can't get enough. The sex scenes themselves are pretty lousy, but like I said, this film is all about seeing HER. If you are a fan of the female form, then this flick is a huge chunk of eye candy, Lena Lomay style.

BAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF!.......2005-02-25

It never fails that every time I experience this film, and I've seen it now about three times in the past year, it produces a vastly different reaction each time I view it. I bounce from absolute admiration for Franco's directorial style, dreamy camerawork and musical score, and committed performances from the cast, to thinking that this is nothing but a cheap, porno-wanna-be-flick with absolutely nothing to do with "vampires", and no artistic integrity whatsoever. Fortunately, the positive vibes win out over the negative and I, once again, admire this film and all that is right and wrong with it. If I fail to make sense, well good then, because neither does this flick. Ms. Romay is, to say the least, totally uninhibited as she romps about the beautifully filmed outdoor scenes while a Chopin-like score lusciously underscores her every movement. Her scenes with the bed posts are, er...., quite a moment in the Euro-Erotic field, and the way she swishes and moves about on her bed like a pent-up, totally horny young woman about to have an orgasm for the first time is, well...... something to see. I love the moments of male frontal nudity, especially a scene where Ms. Romay is seducing a hotel masseur. The simulated sex is quite laughable, especially since our young man can't seem to "get it up". This is quite an atmospheric film and, if you love your 70's horror/vampire flicks, I think you will find much to admire in this one.
Luigi - NYC

Wow.......2004-05-23

That Jess Franco sure was wacky. This ultra-sexy 70's vamp flick probably arouses me more than any modern softcore film, but it's still not as good as Vampire Femmes or Vampyres. The woman here isn't really a vampire in the monster sense of the word. She's more of an energy sucker, kills by sucking sexual energy from her victims. The bad acting will get on some's nerves, and the plot is ludicrous, but if you buy this film to begin with, you can't expect Citizen Kane. A good b-movie sexfest.

Average customer rating:

A TRUE GORE MASTERPIECE, FROM THE AGE OF GORE (1978-1983)
Been There, Done It!!
So Bad it's Almost Good
Misogyny kills it
Its so corny, its funny!

Humanoids From the Deep
Starring: Doug McClure , Ann Turkel , Vic Morrow , Cindy Weintraub , and Anthony Pena
Director: Barbara Peters (II) , and Jimmy T. Murakami
Manufacturer: New Concorde
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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The Beast Within
Breeders
Piranha
Women in Fury
Not of This Earth

ASIN: 6305325812
Release Date: 1999-06-15

Amazon.com

The peculiar genius of schlock-king Roger Corman is in full bloom with this extremely gory, pointedly offensive homage to 1950s monster movies (with a generous helping of Alien thrown in for good measure), in which a legion of mutated salmon-men terrorize a small town in their search for unwilling female companionship. (Potential viewers should be warned that this movie goes to great lengths to show what earlier films in this genre had only implied.) A guilty pleasure for exploitation fans with a strong stomach and a twisted sense of humor. For what it's worth, director Barbara Peters has claimed that additional shock scenes were inserted by producer Corman without her knowledge. The glop-intensive special effects were devised by Rob Bottin, who later went on to gross out the masses with his work on Seven, Robocop, and John Carpenter's graphic remake of The Thing. --Andrew Wright

Customer Reviews:

A TRUE GORE MASTERPIECE, FROM THE AGE OF GORE (1978-1983).......2006-08-23

Humanoids From The Deep was released during the age of gore (1978-1983) in 1980. Incredible film transfer picture is sharp and crisp, audio is loud and clear. An interview with Roger Corman done by Leonard Maltin is really a nice feature on this dvd release. There are also a few other trailers from other Roger Corman movies on this dvd, along with talent bios. Roger Corman really struck a cord with gore fans with Humanoids. Humanoids is 80 minutes just like the old 1950s sci-fi movies. Barbara Peters does an excellent job directing this movie. Vic Morrow plays Hank Slattery so well that I could really believe this hank charachter existed. Doug Mcclure plays the calm and steady Jim Hill. Ann Turkell a believable scientist. All the other lesser known actors really fused the script and the story of Humanoids really well. A young Rob Bottin does an awesome job in the special effects of the mutated Humanoids, Rob Bottins effects work was done for the production of Humanoids in 1979, way before computer animation. I think the effects were quite believable even then in 1980 and even today. The Humanoids are a really believable monster, long teeth, long sharp claws. I could have done without their screeching and wailing but I think it fit the Humanoids perfect. Excellently written story by Frank Arnold and Martin B.Cohen. The ending to Humanoids was shocking for its time, but really quite common as with gore movies at this time (1978-1983). Directors and writers of this film genre were always trying to shock film audiences with gory effects during this time in the film industry. Keep in mind Humanoids came out during the age of gore but also before the MPAA got involved in controlling content in motion pictures. Horror gore movies like Humanoids From The Deep got away with alot of really gory effects. This movie should, I hope will keep your interest, the thing I like about Humanoids is the black humor, black humor aside, viewing the end of Humanoids from the deep will leave you thinking "what if this really happened?". If you have 80 minutes to spare on something wild watch Humanoids From The Deep there is lots of gore and an awesome classical soundtrack by a young James Horner, great Rob Bottin monster effects, political issues about over land development, and by the way a few georgeous ladies to ad to this shlock fest.

Been There, Done It!!.......2005-11-28

I've read the reviews from all 37...and a big kudos to you all for watching this movie. I was a paid extra in the movie(senior year in high school) i can say it was alot of fun being a mindless humanoid when the stunt man refused to get in the suit. Spending my time next to a gas burner to keep us warm at 3:30 in the morning waiting for the next shot. i have great memories of us extras dining with Doug, Vic, Anthony, Ann, Barbra. The movie was campy fun and a definite B movie of desperate measure.

So Bad it's Almost Good.......2005-08-21

Doug McClure established himself as Trampas on tv's "Virginian" that ran from 1962 to 1971. After "The Virginian" McClure had a hit or miss career in the movies. This particular movie is a campy bit of fun that is most assuredly not a family movie, though teenage boys will likely figure out a way to watch it.

The plot is a rehash of monster movie plots that date back to at least the 1950s. We have local creatures that have mutated from fish to become somewhat humanoid. The fish-humanoids move about as fast as an arthritic old man, but that somehow does not prevent the critters from killing dogs and people with abandon. Even more interesting, the creatures seem to figure out a clever way to grab the local ladies, even though they often run away, and mate with them.

Somehow the cast manages to put in a decent acting job in spite of the monster silliness. Doug McClure is level-headed Jim Hill who battles local fisherman and bully Hank Slattery, played by Vic Morrow. Ann Turkel plays a rare female scientist Dr. Susan Drake. Then there are a number of very pretty monster victim babes.

When I watch this movie I think of "Plan 9 from Outer Space," because the monsters shamble along and yet they somehow manage to make victims of healthy men and women. Though some of the victims fall prey to the monsters laying in wait for them, sometimes the victims fall prey through sheer silliness. The monsters are certainly big and strong, and once a humanoid catches a victim the victim is unlikely to survive the encounter if male, and female victims are sexually violated.

The rape of female victims by the monsters raises this movie to a new low. The scenes are graphic and while intended to be horrifying, often end up being a little silly. The victims are stereotypically portrayed as scatterbrained bunnies bolting headlong from a monster only to fall prey to the monster as they somehow manage to fall and scream a lot. For some strange reason the humanoids also have an interest in human female breasts as the monsters rip the bikini tops from their victims. Of course, this movie also assumes that the genetically created monsters have no female monsters to mate with, unless the