Amazons and Gladiators

Starring:Patrick Bergin, Jennifer Rubin, Richard Norton, Nichole Hiltz, Wendi Winburn, Melanie Gutteridge, Mary Tamm, Janina Matiekonyte, Darius Miniotas, Rona Waddington, Tomas Ereminas, Gabija Danieleviciute, Lauren Wilcox
Director: Zachary Weintraub
Studio: Lions Gate
Product Type: DVD

Average customer rating:

The Little Movie That Could
Good for what it is
I would rather die free than be a dancing whore!
You didn't REALLY expect masterpiece theater, did you?
"Dey dun't do zem gud in Lithuania, eh Heine?"

Amazons and Gladiators
Starring: Patrick Bergin , Jennifer Rubin , Richard Norton , Nichole Hiltz , and Wendi Winburn
Director: Zachary Weintraub
Manufacturer: Lions Gate
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B00005RDSB
Release Date: 2002-01-01

Customer Reviews:

The Little Movie That Could.......2006-12-21

I found Amazons and Gladiators a very pleasant surprise. From its packaging I expected a sexploitation flick, in the manner of "women in prison" films but with swords and Romans instead of inmates and wardens. Understand, by the way, I'm not putting down WIP movies, there's a place for such guilty pleasures. But in Amazons and Gladiators, what I got was ever so much more.

Okay, this is obviously a low-budget film. Much of it takes place in the forest simply because, I'm sure, it cost no money to build the "set". None of the actors in A&G is ever going to win an Academy Award. Having said all that, however, Amazons and Gladiators is also obviously the product of talented, skilled people who've taken what they had to work with and crafted a pretty darn good little movie. The writing, direction, camera work, even the acting in this film are all surprisingly good.

The main character is Serena, who as a child has her mother murdered by the brutal Roman governor Marcus Crassius. Kidnapped into slavery as a dancer, ten years pass, her virginity is sold to a Roman Senator. Serena fights back against her rape, killing the Senator, then escapes along with devoted friend-since-childhood and fellow slave Briana and the captured Amazon leader Ione. Taken into the Amazons, trained as a warrior, in time Serena returns to kill Crassius. Captured again, she winds up a gladiator, fighting for the amusement of the people and the governor before finally getting her chance to face Crassius himself.

Not a blindingly original plot, but anything can be done well or poorly. This story stands or falls on our caring for the characters on-screen. Those characters may be a bit stock - the warrior traumatized as a child returning to wreak vengeance on her tormentor, the stern but loving teacher, the steadfast best friend, the evil and sexually degenerate bad guy/governor - but the characters themselves are so well-drawn, so believable, they rise above the stereotypes. We can, especially, become emotionally invested in Serena and her fate, root for her success, because she comes across as an admirable, decent, real person.

The cinematography in Amazons and Gladiators is quite nice. What sets exist might be a bit bare bones, but they're well-designed, well put-together, and get the job done. If the arena fight scenes don't exhibit Russell Crowe Gladiator level choreography, still they also get the job done. Yes, there's a certain amount of female nudity that is in some cases gratuitous. But hey, I **like** female nudity.

This is one of those films that proves "low-budget" doesn't have to mean "bad". Sometimes the lack of a serious budget forces moviemakers to be really inventive in compensation. Depending on the talent, skill level and commitment of the creators involved, you either rise to such a challenge or fall. Everyone involved with making Amazons and Gladiators rose.

It's hard not to like a movie that does so much with so little.

Good for what it is.......2006-10-08

I liked it.. it was a 'turn of your brain and enjoy' kinda movie. It wasn't totally gratutious and save for the guy she ended up with.. it was quite cool.

But just for the record... bathing was extensive in the 'Roman Empire' It was only after Rome fell that bathing fell into disrepute.

I would rather die free than be a dancing whore!.......2004-12-22

So says a captured Amazon who is brought before the Senator. She escapes with the help of kidnapped maiden Serena who stabs the Senator in the back with a candlestick. I'm not sure where the blade came from after the candle fell out, but you go along with it.

Serena was just a young child when her village was attacked by a bloodthirsty Roman General turned Governor. Her father was killed, her sister was kidnapped, and her mother's death rested on her shoulders. Her mother was hung from a tree and Serena was underneath her for support. With her bare feet she had to stand under her mother while hot coals were lit on the ground. Of course her mother died and she was taken away as a slave.

After her escape she rides and trains with the Amazons. Only then does she discover that her grandmother was a great Amazon warrior and she is prophesized to be even greater.

Well there is a lot of sexy costumes, but little sex. Oh there's a whole lot of female nudity for those of us who enjoy sex with our violoence. My favorite chick had no lines, but was only instructed to pour the bath water slowly. Check out the headlights on that little honey WOW!

Anyway there's a whole lot of fighting in this movie, in the woodds and in the gladiator arena. In the end Serena gets her revenge by fighting the governor himself in the arena. After her victory she makes her speech; "And if I hear that anymore women are abused in this town, I will come back and kill you all!"

This is not a great movie, but it's good enough to pop in the old DVD player every now and then.

You didn't REALLY expect masterpiece theater, did you?.......2004-06-03

Anything named "Amazons and Gladiators" cannot be taken as anything more than "B" movie caliber, and this certainly doesn't disappoint. Like all "B" movies about Amazons, it's about a bunch of naked women running around being sex objects while, somewhat hypocrtically, trying to talk and act convincingly about female empowerment in being MORE than sex objects. Characteristically, this empowerment is derived from the pointy end of a sword (phallic references obvious here, huh?).

Anyone who buys or rents this film expecting something more will be disappointed, but probably hasn't been off the back of the turnip wagon long in that case, anyway. Anyone who says they wish to watch it for the quality of the acting or its historical value is probably trying to convince their wife/girlfriend to see it with them so both can enjoy some lesbian action on screen. They will be disappointed, as there is none of that in this film, despite the lead characters' professed confusion as to what exactly a man IS good for....

The story is typical. Serena, a young girl from Pane (I assume a reference to Pannonia, or present day Hungary) is forced by General Marcus Crassius to participate in her mother's execution (taken straight from an old Charles Bronson western, only without the harmonica). She then becomes a dancing slave girl, who quite chastely refuses the (paid) advances of a Roman senator, slaying him the process and running off with the Amazon warrior who happened to be captive in the same room. She joins the Amazons, and sets out with her trusty sidekick to avenge herself on the evil general that killed her mother. She gets the general, then becomes the Amazon queen and defends women's rights across Roman and barbarian lands. We've seen it all before. What's the harm in watching some of it again?

Yes, the costumes are cheesy. Yes, the dialogue is sometimes terrible (there are some Lithuanian actors whose only English is limited to the lines they learned for the film, notably "Yes, my lord"). No, it's not a movie for Feminists. But it's a good mental vacation, regardless. Enjoy it for what it intended to be in the first place, a "B" movie about naked women pretending to be empowered in a time when women were property.

"Dey dun't do zem gud in Lithuania, eh Heine?".......2004-05-06

It's the toothpaste's fault, really! On a short visit to the local 'Drugs-B-Us' store to replenish the toothpaste supply, I got lost again. This happens every time I enter a retail store of any kind. The vast & myriad possibilities of unbridled, rampant consumerism stun my sensibilities into quivering jelly in the same manner I would imagine a TASER does, and within a few seconds I found myself wandering down the DVD movie rack.

Spotting 'AMAZONS & GLADIATORS', and noting the discounted $5.00 price, I immediately knew that it would be as cheap a way of wasting 90 minutes as any one could spend, glued to the Hungry Eye. I am happy to report, my initial surmise was spot on.

This is indeed a DVD penny-dreadful. My first impression was how dreadfully clean all the costumes were. Every roman plebe's garments looked exactly as if they had just been freshly machine-made in Bengladesh from cheap polyester. Second impression was how dreadfully clean and tidy all the characters were--fresh scrubbed, rosy cheeked, perfect orthodonture, nicely styled hair, etc. The S&M styled leather gear was right out of 'Xena: Warrior Princess', with squeeky-clean (and rose-scented, doubtless) cleavage poised as artfully perfect as in a grade 'B' T&A flick, and it was curious how every character was good-looking and attractive, with such striking features (even the Amazon village hags were charming). The fact that baths and regular bathing were virtually unknown in the 1st Century seems to have been conveniently overlooked by the producer of this film, as is the fact that at that distant date, personal bodily 'fragrance' was the most effective prophylactic yet known to (Roman) science of the day. And of course all the men were clean shaven (undoubtedly attributable to the advanced state of exotic metallurgical knowledge in the post-Bronze Age world).

The acting for the most part was indeed mediocre, although it did get a bit better as the flick continued, and the shots of provincial Roman buildings had the painful look of a cheap back-lot movie sets rejected by the Ben-Hur film production of the 60s. The only acting of any substance I felt was demonstrated by this movie's version of the Python's 'Biggus Dickkus' (our banished Roman General), who was sometimes convincing in his portrayal as the sadistic provincial governor.

Another thing that never fails to impress me is how all those emaciated female Amazon ectomorphs were all so capable of swinging that heavy Roman hardware without breaking a sweat. In the real world, I would expect to see such outlaw XX types looking a bit more like bulked-up, steroid-enhanced linebackers for the Oakland raiders, than catwalk models.

While I enjoy a pure fantasy as much as any adult does, I sometimes worry about how films of this sort help further distort the awarenesses of those pre-and-immediately-post-adolescents who watch such maudlin stuff and confuse fantasy with street reality. The only real kick-a** females I know generally drive Hardly Goodsons and hang with MC clubs and they don't look like a slimmed-down version of 'Xena', either.

On the plus side of the equation, it was a harmless (for reflective adults, possessed of a full load of brain cells) 90 minutes of fantasy to pass a lazy afternoon. Most interesting to me was the fact that the production was apparently filmed and shot in Lithuania, judging by the film credits and location acknowledgements appearing at the end of the flick.