Leyner, Mark

Why Do Men Have Nipples? Hundreds of Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini

Average customer rating:

Great fun to read
Very Informative and Puts a Lot of Myths and Old Wives Tales to Rest
Kinda interesting, but not worth the hype
great conversation starter
Good bathroom reader

Why Do Men Have Nipples? Hundreds of Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini
Mark Leyner , and Billy Goldberg
Manufacturer: Three Rivers Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 1400082315
Release Date: 2005-07-26

Book Description

Is There a Doctor in the House?

Say you’re at a party. You’ve had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you’re introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you’d like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven’t had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You’re filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you’ve ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .

•How do people in wheelchairs have sex?

•Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?

•Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?

•Why does asparagus make my pee smell?

•Why do old people grow hair on their ears?

•Is the old adage “beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . .” really true?

. . . then Why Do Men Have Nipples? is the book for you.

Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, Why Do Men Have Nipples? offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.

Download Description

Mark Leyner is the author of My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist; Tooth Imprints on a Corn Dog; I Smell Esther Williams; Et Tu Babe; and The Tetherballs of Bougainville. He has written scripts for a variety of films and television shows. His writing appears regularly in The New Yorker, Time, and GQ.

Billy Goldberg, M.D., is an emergency medicine physician on faculty at a New York City teaching hospital. He is also a writer and artist whose paintings have been exhibited in New York City.

From the Trade Paperback edition.

Customer Reviews:

Great fun to read.......2007-06-15

I love to read books with interesting facts like this book had. It did have the messenger transcripts between the two guys that kind of take away from the book and I felt were just put there as filler. The tidbits of info they put in this book was interesting, and I read through the book with breeze b/c I couldnt put it down. Id definitely tell others to read it, and have passed my copy around to some of my friends to browse through.

Very Informative and Puts a Lot of Myths and Old Wives Tales to Rest.......2007-06-15

This is a very interesting and easy to read format where the reader can find out answers to stuff they've maybe wondered about but never had the courage to ask. Emergency doctor Billy Goldberg and co author Mark Leyner have researched answers to heaps of these questions as well as dispelled many myths and old wives tales ignorantly passed on from generation to generation.

Inside you'll find out why old ladies grow facial hair, does eating chocolate cause acne, why you cry when you cut onions, why there's no point wasting a steak on a black eye, have the excuse by bad parents that their hyperactive kids are misbehaving because of sugar or artificial colour heavy food totally debunked, as well as other the disproving of myths such as carrots help your vision, wet or cold weather causes colds and a heap of others.

The best educational books work because they entertain you as well. Other entertaining and informative books out there are Do Blue Bedsheets Bring Babies?: The Truth Behind Old Wives' Tales, So Gross: Over 100 Gross-Worthy Facts, Great Mythconceptions: The Science Behind the Myths, Hippo Eats Dwarf: A Field Guide to Hoaxes and Other B.S. to name but a few. I have a listmania list of the best of these books going which should be linked to some of these above mentioned books. Check it out if your interested.

Kinda interesting, but not worth the hype.......2007-06-12

This seemed like a great book at first and had some really funny and insightful facts, but I felt for the most part it could have been better. Some of the explainations I felt were either a little too basic or a little too complicated. The IM breaks were very distracting and annoying, though the little story at the begining of each chapter was very entertaining. Great book to have in your bathroom, but wouldn't recommend it to any book clubs.

great conversation starter.......2007-06-09

i usually have this book displayed on my coffee table in the living room, and when i have visitors, they all want to look through the book. great conversation starter.

Good bathroom reader.......2007-05-14

This book is a crack up! It now lives in the bathroom, where a book of this humor should live! I did however bring it down to my favorite pub, to share a few laughs!

People that come over to visit our home, somehow take a really long time in the bathroom, and come out smiling!

Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?: More Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Whiskey Sour

Average customer rating:

Awesome
Fun for everyone
full satisfaction
Do you like Uncle John's Bathroom Reader? You'll love this!
Humor and Medical Science

Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?: More Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Whiskey Sour
Mark Leyner , and Billy Md Goldberg
Manufacturer: Three Rivers Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 0307345971
Release Date: 2006-08-01

Amazon.com

The authors of what is now casually referred to as "that nipple book" are back, with more answers to questions "you'd only ask a doctor after your third whiskey sour." Smart, funny, and informative, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex offers answers to questions you may be too embarrassed to ask, like "Does peeing in the shower cure athlete's foot?" and "Can you breastfeed with fake boobs?" We had the opportunity to ask authors Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg a few questions of our own--read their responses below.
<p clear="all"> <hr noshade="noshade" size="1" class="bucketDivider" /><div class="bucket"> <b class="h1">10 Second Interview: A Few Words With Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg

<img src="http://images.amazon.com/images/G/01/books/promos/a-plus/Mark.Billy.1jpg.jpg" hspace="4" vspace="4" border="0" align="left"> Q: Your first book Why Do Men Have Nipples" was a runaway bestseller. Was there one question that got the ball rolling for that book? What was it?
Goldberg: I collected questions for several years and the idea for the book was slowly percolating. I would have to say that "Why Does My Pee Smell When I Eat Asparagus?" was the question that really got things rolling with respect to finding the voice of the book. We have been accused of including too much potty talk and this one kind of broke the seal on that.
Leyner: The first question for me that got the ball rolling was posed by Dr. Billy Goldberg. It was: "Will you collaborate on this book with me?" Goldberg's a wonderful friend, the coolest doctor in New York City, a fantastically interesting figurative painter, and a pretty formidable tequila drinker. And I figured: what could be more fun than working with this guy and finally finding a way to parlay my perverse interest in medical and biological arcana into something people could really enjoy? It's like Doc Holliday and Wyatt Earp forming a band!

Q: Do people recognize you two on the street now? What is the strangest question/comment you have received from fans?
Goldberg: Mark has been recognized several times on the streets of Hoboken, but the best I have gotten was one of the security guards at the hospital saying, "Hey Doc, I saw you on TV." That, and the nurse's aides calling me Dr. Nipples.
Leyner: I went down to the lobby of a hotel recently because I'd eaten and drunk my mini-bar out of M&Ms and beer, and I needed MORE. The woman at the front desk said to me, "Hey! You're one of those Nipple Guys!!" My sky-rocketing Q-Score earned me a buttload of free Heinekin and Peanut M&Ms. Strangest questions... hmmmmm....either "What was it like being on Montel with mutant dogs and a psychic?" or "Do you two guys do medical experiments on each other?"

Q: How do you determine what questions to put in your books? Are there any questions or topics that you think are off limits?
Goldberg and Leyner: We put questions in that intrigue us, of course. And we especially love questions that make people giggle and cringe at the same time. Nothing is "off limits"... that's the sine qua non of the our whole enterprise. It's our ethos--there's NOTHING too embarrassing to ask.
<hr /="/" noshade="noshade" class="bucketDivider" size="1"> <div class="bucket"> <p clear="all"> <b class="h1">10 Second Preview: An Excerpt

OBLIGATORY PRELUDE TO THE FOREWORD TO THE PROLOGUE TO THE PREFACE OF THE INTRODUCTION
OR
DOES ANYONE READ THIS CRAP?

Okay, so here we go again. . . .

It feels a bit different this time. When we were writing Why Do Men Have Nipples?, we had no idea that anyone (other than our editor, wives, moms, and dads) would read the book. Shows what we know.

Our little nipples book has sold more than a million copies internationally and spent twenty-five weeks (and counting) on the New York Times bestseller list. You have no idea how much we have loved this ride and how much we adore babbling on TV and drive-time radio, and especially in the makeup rooms where we shamelessly flirted with a succession of fantastic makeup artists at all the major networks. (By the way, Mark prefers the spray-on nozzle method, which he likens to being simonized in a car wash.)

But a funny thing happened along the way. We quickly became aware of the fact that we'd barely scratched the surface. As we talked to people who'd enjoyed our first book, we began accumulating hundreds of new questions—some funny, down-to-earth, exotic, some embarrassing, some perplexing, but always thought-provoking enough that we knew we'd have to include them in a brand-new volume.

We realized the gravity of the somber task ahead of us. We felt deputized. We knew we were now bound by honor and a fiduciary duty to you, our readers, to deliver unbiased, unadulterated, thoroughly researched, and unimpeachably factual answers to your questions. Humbled, but galvanized and inspired by the immense challenge that lay before us, we hunkered down in a windowless, antiseptic research cocoon, and made a solemn pledge to produce a new volume that would surpass the original and blaze new trails in the democratization of medical knowledge.

Oh please . . . SEQUEL!!!!!!! Here it is . . . Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?

<hr /="/" noshade="noshade" class="bucketDivider" size="1"> <div class="bucket">

Book Description

The Doctor Is In . . . Again!

Did the mega-bestselling Why Do Men Have Nipples? exhaust your curiosity about stuff odd, icky, kinky, noxious, libidinous, or just plain embarrassing? No, you say? Well, good, because the doctor and his able-bodied buddy are in! Again! Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D., now take on the differences between the sexes—those burning questions like Why doesn’t my husband ever listen? or Why does my wife ALWAYS have to pee? And of course, Why do men fall asleep after sex?, plus plenty of others to keep you fully informed.

Full of smart and funny answers to an onslaught of new questions, all in a do-ask-we’ll-tell spirit that entertain and teaches you something at the same time, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? offers the real lowdown on everything everyone wants to know about all things anatomical, medical, sexual, nutritional, animal, and mineral, but would only ask a physician after a few too many, like:

• Why do you have a “bionic” sense of smell when you’re pregnant?

• Does peeing in the shower cure athlete’s foot?

• Is a dog’s mouth clean?

• Can you breastfeed with fake boobs?

• Does thumb sucking cause buckteeth?

• Do your eyebrows grow back if shaved?

Bigger, funnier, and better than ever, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? proves that in the battle of the sexes, as in most things, a little Q&A is a safe, effective, minimally invasive remedy.

Also available as an eBook

Customer Reviews:

Awesome.......2007-05-14

This book is not only informative about many myths and queries we have all heard, but it is funny too!!! I have learned some very funny and quirky facts so far. I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes interesting, funny facts.

Fun for everyone.......2007-04-13

I really enjoyed reading this book. A lot of questions I always wondered about have now been answered. And, it's in a very easy to read format.

full satisfaction .......2007-04-10

Full satisfaction !! Delay , packaging and items ! All was perfect !

Do you like Uncle John's Bathroom Reader? You'll love this! .......2007-04-05

This book is full of the information to questions that you've always wanted an answer to. Highly recommended.

Humor and Medical Science.......2007-04-05

As a scientist I read this for my own curiosity. I have a hard time keeping Leyner's books (also "Why Do Men Have Nipples") out of my students hands - they often grab it off the shelf, without asking, and become very focused. Students read this voraciously, want to learn more and ask a multitude of questions they never thought about before.

Leyner's books open the world of objective thinking and scientific curiosty wide and deep. Yes, there is much humor between the pages. These books provide the answers to questions we have not yet learned how to ask and help us ask more. Well done.

Average customer rating:

Cool Stuff
Bizarre and hilarious
Hilariously Funny Babe!
Et Tu, Bah
Brilliant

Et Tu, Babe
Mark Leyner
Manufacturer: Vintage
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 0679745068
Release Date: 1993-08-24

Book Description

In this fiendishly original new novel, Mark Leyner is a leather-blazer-wearing, Piranha 793-driving, narcotic-guzzling monster who has potential rivals eliminated by his bionically enhanced bodyguards, has his internal organs tattooed, and eavesdrops on the erotic fantasies of Victoria's Secret models -- which naturally revolve around him.

Leyner's jet-propelled roller derby through the cultures of celebrity, cyberpunk, and rabid egotism is exhilaratingly bizarre, exhaustingly funny -- and you'd better hope it's just fiction.

Customer Reviews:

Cool Stuff.......2007-06-13

If you're looking for a book that has a conventional structure (plot, story, etc.) you might not like this, since it's a lot of abstract humor about absolutely nothing. But it's great at what it is. It's like a very spicy food. It will burn a hole right through your brain.

Bizarre and hilarious.......2006-01-11

Mark Leyner is a strange, strange man. Weird and outrageously funny, this narcissistic pseudo-autobiography made me laugh so hard I thought I'd choke. You'll either love it or hate it.

Hilariously Funny Babe!.......2005-12-18

Mark Leyner is a strange writer to describe, whose work crosses genres with equal abandon. Here he tries to sound a bit like William Gibson (Though maybe a more apt comparison is Neal Stephenson, since his style and sensibility is much closer to Stephenson's than Gibson's.), Kurt Vonnegut, and of course Hunter S. Thompson. Indeed, "Et Tu, Babe" is what I'd expect from someone who had been cloned to resemble the worst excesses in literary style from the likes of both Stephenson, and especially, Thompson. Leyner goes well beyond a hilarious zone of neutrality at maximum warp speed, slicing and dicing celebrity culture with ample terse literary aplomb, while tossing some funny bon mots in a clever cyberpunk twist. Here Leyner imagines himself as some famous bigshot writer who is out to change the course of human history - and maybe, he almost does in this weird, though often, hysterically funny, brief tome of a novel.

Et Tu, Bah.......2004-02-12

Having read, My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist, I had high hopes for Et Tu, Babe. However, other than a few hilarious venues(the "everything" sandwich, visceral tattoos, and the Schwarzeneggerization of America), this was a disappointment. I wound up skimming through too much tedium. I suspect Leyner had personal problems midway (the Arlene Scene) as the 2nd half of the book d r a g s. Nun thee less, Leyner when he's on is one of the funniest orgasmic writers around.

Brilliant.......2003-04-22

It's a Mark Leyner book. That's about as much of a compliment as I can think of. Really a uniquely disturbing individual. But a brilliant, innovative writer.

My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist: A novel

Average customer rating:

hilarious
Why no love?
Fizz
Not as good as his others
Disapointing

My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist: A novel
Mark Leyner
Manufacturer: Vintage
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 0679745793
Release Date: 1995-05-10

Customer Reviews:

hilarious.......2006-04-20

Very very clever and full of anarchic wordplay. Enjoying the absurdity of the wordplay is enough to give these stories meaning. despite a previous reviewer saying it was infantile - it think in this era of sappy books designed to enlighten people, which hardly seems to be saving society as we know it - a dose of weird and crazed thinking may do more to impact the way people think than a straightforward native with a "moral." Dig it.

Why no love?.......2004-02-03

In a world of hate and war, we must take a look back on this book. "My Cousin" was the first book by Leyner I read.
And, I still read it. This tome of delightful, poetic anarchy is not for everyone; But, if you can be distracted by the rantings of a stick figure in a Jhonen Vasquez comic, then this should definetly be a treat for you.
I recommend "Enter The Squirrel".

I say "Ole`!" to this author. (That's a good thing.) And, I recommend this book to everyone I meet, pass by, or steal from.
My rating?
Two fists up.

Fizz.......2003-07-22

I must ask your indulgence for a brief autobiographical anecdote (it is relevant). When I was seventeen-years-old, I was an aspiring author, and this was one of my favorite books, along with Henry Miller's BLACK SPRING. MY COUSIN, MY GASTROENTEROLOGIST, I thought, expanded language to the breaking point. Flash-forward ten years later. I found a jaundiced copy of this book in my parents' basement, along with BLACK SPRING, and re-read both during a week-long visit.

Was I ever THAT young????

My impressions had changed radically. The book now seemed infantile to me: it is nothing more, really, than a frivolous, badly strung-together collection of verbal sound-bites. The book is superficial and hollow at its core. Now, I'm not a fan of transcendental meanings or linear narratives, but, FOR GOD'S SAKE or for the sake of WHOMEVER, even experimental fiction should have at least SOME formal consistency. The surrealists' experiments (one thinks of SOLUBLE FISH or THE MAGNETIC FIELDS) or the work of Alfred Jarry all have an internal logic. This book has none. It is completely meaningless and disjointed.

In fact, the book is a mess: a hastily written, blithe little throwaway of a book.

MY COUSIN, MY GASTROENTEROLOGIST is pure entertainment, nothing more. If that is all you are interested in, so be it. But if that is the case, then you must accept that there is ESSENTIALLY nothing to distinguish this book from an episode of the TV show, FRIENDS, except that the latter is probably more memorable.

This book belongs on the shelf next to BLACK SPRING, a much more "illustrious" book (if only because it was reviewed by Maurice Blanchot), but also one that suffers from a similar disorder.

I've given this book two stars only because to give it one would be to demean my prior self.

Not as good as his others.......2003-04-23

I was a little disapointed in this one. Not as good as Et Tu, Babe, and Tooth Imprints on a Corndog. I guess his later work is the best.

Disapointing.......2003-04-22

He is one of the best writers in America, but this one is definitely not as good as 'Tooth Imprints on a Corndog' or 'Et Tu, Babe.' Get the others first. If you're a collector, then get this one.

Why Do Men Have Nipples? Page-A-Day Calendar 2007 (Page a Day Calendar)

Average customer rating:

Somewhat Funny
pretty funny and interesting, too

Why Do Men Have Nipples? Page-A-Day Calendar 2007 (Page a Day Calendar)
Mark Leyner , and M.D., Billy Goldberg
Manufacturer: Workman Publishing Company
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Calendar

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ASIN: 0761142819

Book Description

Imagine buttonholing a really smart doctor at a cocktail party and asking every odd, icky, or embarrassing question you can think of. And getting the answers! Introducing the WHY DO MEN HAVE NIPPLES? CALENDAR, based on the #1 New York Times bestseller of the same name, with 570,000 copies in print. Here is a truly fascinating year of questions you’d like to ask your doctor but never could (at least not before your third martini). With wit and irreverence, the authors answer: If you are stranded on a desert island, should you drink seawater or your own urine? Why do you laugh when tickled? What is a food coma? And the ever-popular “Beer before liquor, never sicker/Liquor before beer, never fear”?

Customer Reviews:

Somewhat Funny.......2007-02-09

It can be funny and interesting most days, but sometimes you think, "what in the world were they thinking?" My husband thinks it's funny, too. However, the base of the item is pretty flimsly. It doesn't take much to knock it over.

pretty funny and interesting, too.......2007-01-20

I bought this for the hubby for Christmas, and he loves it...he calls me during the day to share funny bits of information from the calendar

The Tetherballs of Bougainville: A Novel

Average customer rating:

ADVENTURES IN HEBEPHRENIC NARRATIVE
2nd greatest book I've ever read, no...THE GREATEST
He must be on drugs...
Leyner writes a plot driven story
Funny, yes....Great...well....no.

The Tetherballs of Bougainville: A Novel
Mark Leyner
Manufacturer: Vintage
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Contemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 067976349X
Release Date: 1998-09-01

Amazon.com

Mark Leyner's hyperactive, relentlessly vivid The Tetherballs of Bougainville stars a fictionalized 13-year-old version of himself. Young Leyner--who sounds just like the author, the conceit is insincere--must watch the state of New Jersey execute his PCP-addled father; lose his virginity in a drunken, drugged revel with the comely warden; and write a screenplay about these things, all within the space of a day. Don't be alarmed, just turn off your left brain and keep reading. The Tetherballs of Bougainville is a soup of observation, weird juxtaposition, parody, and ribaldry that will leave some people stymied, but others positively delighted. The satire--and sense--is where you find it.

Here's Mark, with an aside: "As I browse through this astonishing array of contraband, I can't help but marvel at the ingenuity of the inmates. In the Body Cavity/Rectal section, for instance--I can imagine someone smuggling in a wrapped shank ... But four 5-piece place settings of Bastille stainless-steel flatware? I can see how, during a visit, a girlfriend could convey, through a kiss, a condom partially filled with heroin. But a 959-piece Alsatian Village Puzzle? How? Piece by piece, one kiss per visit per week? Imagine the incarcerated hobbyist's Zen-like equanimity."

Rich stuff, this. But as disorienting as the book may be, it possesses a brutal amount of horsepower--the amount of laughs it will induce excuse myriad indulgences. Half novel, half screenplay, packed to the endpapers with pop culture, The Tetherballs of Bougainville is a full-body experience.

Book Description

From his cult classic,  I Smell Esther Williams, to his wildly popular and insightful column "Wild Kingdom" appearing in Esquire magazine every month, Mark Leyner has been giving us up close and personal encounters of the most hilarious kind for over a decade.

Now, in his new novel The Tetherballs of Bougainville, Leyner shares with us,  long last, the quintessential coming of age story that every writer, at some point, is compelled to tell.  In the novel we meet young Mark Leyner, 13-years-old to be exact, as he waits in a New Jersey prison to witness his father's execution.  Adolescence is never easy, and it just so happens that this junior high schooler is on deadline to turn in a screenplay for which he has already been awarded the Vincent and Lenore DiGiacomo/Oshimitsu Polymers America Award.  And, as it was for all of us during out teenage years, nothing seems to go as planned.

Written as autobiography, screenplay and movie review, The Tetherballs of Bougainville twists three familiar narrative forms into an outlandishly compelling story.  Leyner's use of the media-driven formats brilliantly reflects our secret, shameful and hilarious desire to experience our private lives as mass entertainment.  The Tetherballs of Bougainville skewers and celebrates American pop culture in the late twentieth century.  Leyner's version of our lives is so deeply funny because it is so painfully true.

Customer Reviews:

ADVENTURES IN HEBEPHRENIC NARRATIVE.......2006-06-20

This must be the best of Leyner's books, but it's still a difficult read. It's like drinking down a jug a Frank's Red Hot Sauce, and I don't think I'd wanna meet anyone who read it in one sitting. (Surely you've seen such people on the cop shows.) Getting through the novel was especially difficult for me, as I had placed a large C-clamp on my head while reading, and with each mention of anything morbid or lewd, I'd tighten the clamp a half turn. The purpose of such an exercise was to reshape my cranium to match the Brainiac forehead of Mr. Leyner. Only a dedicated votary of his work would do such a thing, although Caryl Chessman might've done so too had he lived to read Leyner.

2nd greatest book I've ever read, no...THE GREATEST.......2004-01-17

This is one of those books that if you get it, you love it, but if you don't get it you're in for 300 pages of extreme pain. You need some sort of touch on the pulse of pop culture for one thing and you need some sort of touch on the pulse of what it's like to be a young teenage male. With those two tools you are ready for the greatest ride in all of literature.

The jokes actually rarely fall flat, which is amazing considering there are like 25 on every page. The book is hysterical from start to finish, the ending of the book is absolutly perfect. And leyner definalty succeeded in making it seem like I was the main charector. Forget Holden Caufield, I was Mark Leyner.

He must be on drugs..........2003-09-13

I laughed so hard I almost puked--many times. I don't know how else to describe his writing, because I've never encountered anything like it anywhere. It's the best anti-depressant I can think of.

Leyner writes a plot driven story.......2003-04-15

"The Tehterballs of Bougainville" while far from your standard fiction novel is still Mark Leyner's most accessable book and most plot driven.

The narrative is, as usual with Leyner, taut with jackhammer style bursts of narrative. Leyner dispenses with detail and spends his time creating vivid, drug-like situations.

A execution goes wrong and the person to be executed is given a letter explaining he will be killed at a later date of the state's choosing without his knowledge, it may be while he's eating, etc.
The young protagonist gets it on with the female warden in a drug stupored sex scene.
The young protagonist is constantly interrupting procedings to take calls from his agent.

These are Mark Leyner themes. They crop up in all his work but here he manages to keep the narrative together and still deliver on the super-charged writing style that at once reads like a travel poster and a crazed rant.

Read the excerpts to see if this appeals to you. Leyner has some readers that dismiss him as fast food, faux literature. You may be one of these people, or you may appreciate the style which some newer authors have taken note of or have been influenced by.

Read Leyner and then read Chuck Palahniuk. Palahniuk is still a dense, fast read but seems languid compared to Leyner. Intentional or not these authors remind me of one another for their terse prose and cutural obsessions. Leyner tends to stick to seemingly lighter subjects but in fact makes the same points with the use of broader comedy and absurdism.

A fun, quick read that can be enjoyed more than once.

Funny, yes....Great...well....no........2002-09-19

This book is funny, I will give it that, but it can drag on and on and .... well, you get my point. I liked how the structure of the book changed from a story, to a screen play, to a movie review, and then back to the screen play, but the movie review was just too much for me. It's really not pertinent to the book at all (in my opinion), so if you get to that point and wonder if you should continue, I'd say no. Leyner could have shortened it up a bit to keep the reader more interested.

Book Description

The Why Do Men Have Nipples? Calendar returns for 2008. Based on the #1 New York Times bestsellers Why Do Men Have Nipples? and Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? this truly engrossing calendar features hundreds of answers to those odd and embarrassing medical questions you just can't bring yourself to ask the doctor. Such as: Why does the bed spin after a long night at the bar? And Can you actually explode from eating too much? (It's rare, but stomach rupture from overeating has happened.) Plus pop quizzes, jargon, On This Day, quotes, Disease of the Month, DIY medical procedures, and more.

Average customer rating:

Unreadable
Not the smart satirist and absurdist he would later become
Beware
Don't get me wrong...
Yes, but...

I Smell Esther Williams
Mark Leyner
Manufacturer: Vintage
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Contemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

United States | Short Stories | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

General | Short Stories | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
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My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist: A novel
Why Do Men Have Nipples? Hundreds of Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini

ASIN: 0679750452
Release Date: 1995-01-31

Book Description

A community theater's production of Special Yearnings triggers a string of underground nuclear explosions from St. Louis to Worcester, Massachusetts. A man frantically swats at the blaze that his girlfriend has ignited in his trousers, while her family tries to figure out whether his agonized sign language means "Under the Volcano" or "No Time for Sergeants." Charo, Marianne Faithfull, and Napoleon's sister swap glittering witticisms and pornographic come-ons with languid aesthetes and unhinged suburbanites.

Such scenarios are just par for the course in this gloriously disorienting volume by Mark Leyner, author of My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist and Et Tu, Babe, and a writer who plays the English language the way Jimi Hendrix played the guitar: at blinding speed, dangerous volume, and with a perfect mixture of lyricism and sheer menace.

Customer Reviews:

Unreadable.......2003-04-01

'Tooth Imprints on A Corndog' is great. This one is an unreadable collection of rambling nonsense.

Not the smart satirist and absurdist he would later become.......2001-06-17

Leyner is more often than not a solid 4-star writer (My Cousin, Et Tu, Tetherballs), but his first book offers little pleasure beyond the fun of its title. A number of years passed between this debut and the much more worthwhile "My Cousin" and it was a healthy period of artistic growth, evidently. There are a few flashes of cleverness here and there, but this is overall a soggy and underdeveloped effort that makes you realize how delicate and precise his unique style is: in later works, it's a marvel of pop culture satire, rapid fire wit, and intriguing arcania. Here, it's a sophomoric dud that too often reads like really bad Barthelme. Or really bad Leyner.

Beware.......2000-11-04

Don't misunderstand: everything Leyner's done after this first collection is brilliant writing and mandatory reading. But ESTHER WILLIAMS is the most godawful hodgepodge of literary conceits and pratfalls you may ever be unlucky enough to read. Obviously, some episode of satori marked the time between this and his next book, the now-classic MY COUSIN, MY GASTROENTEROLOGIST. I'm being harsher than I should be, perhaps, considering how great a satirist Leyner has become. But even he probably wishes this book would crawl off his resume. Take a pass on ESTHER and go straight to his other four collections.

Don't get me wrong..........2000-01-23

I like Mark Leyner, but this book (his first) is way below par. It's obviously juvenilia, dressed up by Vintage after Leyner's success, and recovered from the tiny press (the Fiction Collective, Boulder) who took this unformed, trivial, pretentious book on in the first place. There are a few funny lines and some evocative moments in here, but overall it's not worth the time or money. Work your way back to this one from the books published since Leyner learned how to write.

Yes, but..........1999-03-11

It's true, he's a hilarious writer. But could we please look up the word "penultimate" in the dictionary before using it again? Thanks Virginia!

Average customer rating:

Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex CD
Mark Leyner , and Billy Goldberg
Manufacturer: HarperAudio
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Audio CD

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The Darwin Awards 4: Intelligent Design (Darwin Awards)
I Shouldn't Even Be Doing This!: And Other Things That Strike Me as Funny

ASIN: 0061173436
Release Date: 2006-08-01

Book Description

Did the mega-bestselling Why Do Men Have Nipples? exhaust your curiosity about stuff odd, icky, kinky, noxious, libidinous, or just plain embarrassing? "No," you say? Well good, because the doctor and his able-bodied buddy are IN! Again! Now go-to authorities for that sort of thing, Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D., take on the differences between the sexes—those burning questions like, "Why Doesn't My Husband Ever Listen?" or "Why Does My Wife ALWAYS Have to Pee?" and of course, "Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?" plus plenty of others to keep you fully informed. </p>

Full of smart and snarky answers to an onslaught of new questions, all in the do-ask-we'll-tell spirit, that entertain and teach you something at the same time, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? offers the real lowdown on all the myriad of the things that everyone wants to know about all things anatomical, medical, sexual, nutritional, animal, mineral, but would only ask a physician after a few too many. Bigger, funnier, and better than ever, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? proves that in the battle of the sexes, as in most things, a little Q&A is a safe, effective, minimally invasive remedy. </p>

Tooth Imprints On a Corn Dog
Average customer rating:

Give this man back his medication

oooooohhhhh yeah

Not Really Based On "Jokes"

Cheeky obviosities

Hillarious comments about life.

Tooth Imprints On a Corn Dog
Mark Leyner
Manufacturer: Vintage
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Cats, Dogs & Animals | Humor | Entertainment | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0679745211
Release Date: 1996-01-03

Book Description

A fiendishly innovative young writer ups the ante on his cult classics Et Tu, Babe and My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist with a book so funny that it ought to be a controlled substance. "With his pumped-up prose and steroidal satire . . . You could call him the Quentin Tarantino of cult fiction."--Newsweek.

Customer Reviews:

Give this man back his medication.......2000-08-20

Leyner leaves his "teeth imprints" with the 17 stories, plays, ramblings, and dedications contained within. With his Dennis Miller-ish vocabulary, Reyner remarks on the absurdity that is prevalent in modern life.

"The Mary Poppins' Kidnapping" throws a nod to the present censoring of the media. After viewing "Mary Poppins" three teenagers kidnap an English woman so that they could have a nanny. This triggers an across the board censorship for anything from "Mary Poppins" to "The Sound Of Music" stating that it's "...irresponsible to expose young people from middle- and low-income families to films depicting ostentatious affluence." which "...has the potential for provoking very explosive antisocial behavior."

"The (Illustrated) Body Politics" exposes that senators have hidden tattoos that represent their true standings on issues. In "Oh, Brother", two Melendez type brothers kill their parents with Howitzer shells, rocket-propelled grenades and 9mm Luger rounds then plead innocent using the "imperfect self-defense" concept. Stating that since their parents were understanding, supportive, and compassionate towards them, they didn't act like other parents and were covering up a plot to kill them so they struck first.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Writing like Christopher Moore with a newly acquired thesaurus, Leyner makes you laugh, cringe, and wonder. After possibly the longest dedication in written history the fun begins. Although he loves using big words don't be scared off. Bring a dictionary (optional) and an open mind (mandatory) and enjoy.

oooooohhhhh yeah.......2000-04-19

Nah, I think I would have to say that this book IS falling down funny, in fact I've never laughed so much. Burroughs, Thompson, I hear people compare Mark Leyner to so many beat or other post-modern writers, but I guarantee you that you will NEVER read something quite like this. I ended up reading at least half the book aloud to my roommate while tears were falling down my face from my fits of laughter. It may not be for everyone, but it is surely for anyone like myself that likes their humor fast, random, and fantastically absurd.

Not Really Based On "Jokes".......2000-03-17

The reviewer who gave this book only one star seems to have been anticipating a great number of punchlines in this book. There aren't that many. The book isn't based on "jokes" as such but on wry, pithy obsevations of the world at large, seen through the lens of Leyner's sense of the absurd. If you want "jokes," there are plenty of books like that out there. This book is not for a general audience anyway -- it takes a special outlook to even appreciate this book -- but for those with the mind set to appreciate this kind of humor, while it may not be falling-down funny, it is enjoyable.

Cheeky obviosities.......1999-05-12

To tell you the truth, I bought this book because some reviewer said that Leyner is William Burroughs and Beavis&Butthead combined. Well, no need to rush to your nearest internet bookstore -- he is neither. His jokes are not funny, they are at most cheeky (and by that I mean the kind of cheakiness that people in their 40s have when they try to sound young, fresh, hip, clever and imaginative). At first you allow yourself a smile, in anticipation of "the funny stuff", but it just never comes. This collection of short stories is probably "ok" for a column in Esquire, but it is simply inadequate as a book, because while in mens' magazines apart from the text you also have pictures of pretty chicks, this compilation has nothing else to offer.

Granted, it is difficult to judge a writer by short stories, but reading this is a total waste of time and I can only blame myself for being too thick to realise it only after I almost finished the book. Oh, by the way, here in the UK the book has a different title: "A dream date with Di". Well, a person fantasizing about a date with Princess Di does not strike one as a progressive writer, and one who actually tries to make fun of the idea is even worse.

Hillarious comments about life........1999-01-30

This book was the most hillarious thing i have ever read. I laughed so hard i cried. Everyone needs to read this book, it is wonderfully relaxing and therapeutic.

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